- Festus: [Festus making goo-goo sounds to baby only to turn around and see Doc] Why don't you let a fella know you're around? You come slipping up like a blamed old coyote through a fog.
- Doc: What are you doing to that baby?
- Festus: Well, I'm making her laugh!
- Doc: Making her laugh? With an ugly face full of whiskers like that? You'll scare her to death!
- Festus: To Doc, after he's been very vocal to Festus about his coffee: Pills with a mouth, that's what you are.
- Matt Dillon: Sometimes I only have 1 second to decide whether or not to kill a man. That's a heavy weight to carry around,