- Eddie Finnerty: It was very therapeutic. I'm telling you, Sean, if you ever dump Claudia, you give it a try!
- Claudia Finnerty: Thanks, Eddie!
- Eddie Finnerty: You can try it, too, Claudia. I just thought you might be busy with the children.
- Jimmy Finnerty: I really need to go on the road! The road is calling me!
- Eddie Finnerty: Let the machine get it.
- Sean Finnerty: [Trying to convince Claudia to have unprotected sex] You can't get pregnant in a hot tub! It's a scientific fact!
- Sean Finnerty: [to Lily] You love Mocha Jojo's! You've got that discount card!
- Claudia Finnerty: Yeah! It seems like you've been there all summer getting your card punched!
- Brad O'Keefe: Thanks for ruining coffee for me!
- Lily Finnerty: Well, thanks for ruining space for me!
- Eddie Finnerty: I took that pain and I channeled it into my lifelong passion:
- [Sean and Claudia stare quizzically, Eddie sighs]
- Eddie Finnerty: standup comedy!