Gilmore Girls (TV Series)

Nag Hammadi Is Where They Found the Gnostic Gospel (2004)

Lauren Graham: Lorelai Gilmore

Quotes 

• Lorelai : I'm going to make out in the coat room. Don't eat my chicken.

  Rory : That's going on your tombstone.

• Rory : So who else is joining us?

  Emily : No one. We brought one of Richard's coats to hang over the chair.

  Richard : We're saying it's Marjorie's husband's.

  Emily : He's making the rounds, and at about eight he'll get sick and have to leave.

  Richard : Does everybody understand the story?

  Lorelai : I think so. But then we'll have to hide his jacket. So I suggest I put it under my dress and pretend to be pregnant, then Jason can pretend to be the doctor. Then Rory can dig a tunnel, and...

  Emily : I might have known you'd turn this into something ridiculous, Lorelai.

  Rory : Yeah, I wanna be the doctor.

• Lorelai : Hey, did anyone ever think Sylvia Plath wasn't crazy, maybe she was just cold?

• Lorelai : Cold, cold, cold, cold, icy feet. Stupid, frozen tundra house. Honey, why are you sleeping in here? Your room is way warmer. Ok, here is the question for today kids: what the hell are the Eskimos thinking? I mean yes, the hoods are cute but it's always cold, always! Plus you have to eat fish for breakfast, and you have to eat whales, and polar bears, and penguins and Santa Clause. Coffee's on and Pop-Tarts are poptarting! If you're just gonna lie there I'm just gonna have to sit here. I'm gonna have to make myself very comfortable on my nice warm Rory!

  Rory : Why is it so cold in here?

  Lorelai : Ahh!

  Rory : Ahh!

  Lorelai : But I was sitting on you!

  Rory : Oh, really, good trick.

  Lorelai : But if you were there, then who's this?

  Rory : I don't know.

  Lorelai : We've got a stranger in our house.

  Rory : Robert Downey Jr.?

  Lorelai : Or a murderer.

  Rory : Who needed a nap before committing his crimes?

• Lane : Hey, did somebody sit on me just now?

  Lorelai : No, why?

  Lane : My hip hurts.

  Lorelai : Mm, gettin' old.

• Emily : It's a complete disaster!

  Lorelai : My existence?

• Lorelai : So...

  Rory : So?

  Lorelai : I was just wondering what you were thinking about.

  Rory : I was thinking about nothing.

  Lorelai : Nothing wouldn't happen to wear a leather jacket and pull off a very convincing "Adriaaann", would it?

• Richard : What was his body language like?

  Lorelai : Well, he was breathing and standing. I think all signs point to alive!