- Lorelai Gilmore: Hello?
- Karen: Lorelai Gilmore?
- Lorelai Gilmore: You got her.
- Karen: I'm calling from Richard Gilmore's office.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Never heard of him.
- Karen: Richard Gilmore, your father.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Ooh, tall, bow tie?
- Karen: Yes.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Yes. I'm with you now. Go ahead.
- Luke Danes: What did you just do?
- Lorelai Gilmore: What?
- Luke Danes: You put the cookie down.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Yeah.
- Luke Danes: You ate the cookie, then you took the cookie out of the box, and put it where the cookie you just ate was.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Yeah.
- Luke Danes: Well, that's nuts.
- Lorelai Gilmore: Rory made this for me. I don't wanna ruin it.
- Luke Danes: Then why'd you eat the cookie?
- Lorelai Gilmore: I wanted a mallomar.
- Luke Danes: But why didn't you just one out of the box?
- Lorelai Gilmore: This one was right here. The box was all the way in the cupboard.
- Luke Danes: But you had to go to the cupboard to get the box to replace the cookie you ate off the table.
- Lorelai Gilmore: So?
- Fran Westin: So that's a four foot chocolate cake with individual vanilla cupcakes on top spelling out Happy 16th Birthday, Lorelai?
- Rory Gilmore: That's right.
- Fran Westin: Would you like butter cream or whip cream frosting on that?
- Rory Gilmore: Can you do both?
- Fran Westin: That's alot of frosting.
- Rory Gilmore: I know. But it's my mom's favorite part. Once we tried to make a cake entirely out of frosting, which turned out to be better in theory than in actual execution.
- Fran Westin: Well, both frostings it is, then.
- Michel Gerard: Well, this is wonderful, to smell like a dead person. You'll have to beat them off with a stick.
- Jackson Belleville: I have got a sobbing pregnant woman at home, which is not unusual except this time I didn't cause it!
- Jess: So, it's been a couple days since you made the big decision. You're still going to Yale?
- Rory Gilmore: Yes, I am. It's got all the classes I want and some really great teachers, and plus, you know, as an added bonus, it's really close to here.
- Jess: 22.8 miles.
- Rory Gilmore: How'd you know that?
- Jess: Do you Yahoo?
- Rory Gilmore: You looked it up?
- Jess: Yeah.
- Rory Gilmore: You looked it up.
- Jess: I just hit a couple buttons on the computer.
- Rory Gilmore: You looked it up.
- Jess: I was bored. There was nothing on TV and I was fooling around, it was something to do, that's it.
- Rory Gilmore: [lovingly] You looked it up.
- Jess: I got the video for tonight.
- Rory: What did you get?
- Jess: Almost Famous.
- Rory: No, not again!
- Jess: I can't help it, I'm addicted!
- Rory: Fine, but if I'm going to spend two hours sitting there watching Kate Hudson commit suicide again, then we are ordering Indian food.
- Jess: Oh, come on!
- Rory: Hey, last night when we watched Ed Wood, we got burgers like you wanted to.
- Jess: Okay fine, tonight Indian food, but tomorrow Saturday Night Fever and Thai food.
- Lane: That's so cute, you're like a really sweet old agoraphobic couple!
- Jess: Thank you very much.