- Chandler: That's the magical story you use when you want to have sex!
- Rachel: How do you know about that story?
- Joey: How do you know about that story?
- Rachel: I heard it from my friend Irene who heard it from some guy.
- Joey: [raising his hand and pointing to himself] Some guy!
- Rachel: No, she told me his name was Ken Adams.
- Joey: [raising his hand again] Ken Adams.
- Ross: I'm kind of going through a dry spell, sex wise.
- Joey: Oh... for, like, months?
- Ross: Five, to be... lying. Six.
- Joey: Six months? Oh, that's rough.
- Ross: No, I mean, it's not all bad. I'm learning to appreciate the small things in life, like the sound of a bird, and the color of the sky...
- Joey: Sky's blue, Ross! And I had sex yesterday.
- Joey: [Teaching Ross the "Europe story" to help him end his "dry spell"] Years ago when I was backpacking through western Europe I was just outside Barcelona hiking in the foothills of Mount Tibidabo, I was at the end of this path and I came to a clearing, there was a very secluded lake and there were tall trees all around, it was dead silent and across the lake I saw a beautiful woman bathing herself but she was crying...
- Ross: [Pleading] Please help me I have a date tonight, it has to go well I'm scared for my health.
- Joey: [Thinking quickly] Okay, I got something, it's a story I came up with. It's very romantic. I swear any woman that hears it, they become "putty".
- Ross: Really? Well, tell it to me.
- Joey: [Genuinely warning him] Now you're going to want to have sex with me, but remember it's just "a story".
- Ross: [Sarcastically] I'll try to control myself.
- Joey: Okay, years ago when I was backpacking through Western Europe...
- Ross: [Doubtfully] You were backpacking through Western Europe?
- Joey: [Feeling belittled and gets up to leave] Have a nice six more months.
- Ross: Okay, listen, I am not a pervert.
- Phoebe Buffay: That's, like, the pervert motto. Yeah, they have you raise your right hand, put your left hand down your pants and repeat that.
- Rachel: [when Ross walks in] Oh there he is, the father of my child, the porn king of the west Village.
- Ross: Rachel won't talk to me. She won't even open the door.
- Phoebe Buffay: I wonder why, pervert.
- Ross: Ok listen. I am not a pervert.
- Phoebe Buffay: That's like the pervert motto.