- Joey: Guess what job I just got?
- Chandler Bing: I don't know, but Donald Trump wants his blue blazer black.
- [pauses]
- Ross: What?
- Chandler Bing: Blue blazer back. He wants it back.
- Rachel: But, you said "black". Why would he want his blue blazer black?
- Chandler Bing: Well, you know what I meant.
- Monica Geller: No, you messed it up. You're stupid.
- [Ross got Joey a job at the museum, as a tour guide]
- Rachel: But shouldn't you know what you're talking about?
- Joey: Yeah, but they tell me everything I need to know. It's like reading a script. Like, "this is a Tyranosaurus Rex a creature from the Jurassic period".
- [everyone approves]
- Ross: Actually, Joey, it's the Cretaceous period.
- Joey: Yeah, but, I can pronounce Jurassic.
- Monica Geller: All right, I'm gonna show you something a lot of guys don't know. Rach, give me that pad, please?
- [Monica starts drawing on it]
- Monica Geller: All right. Now...
- Chandler Bing: Look, you don't have to draw an actual wo... Whoa! She's hot!
- Monica Geller: Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones.
- [She starts labeling them]
- Monica Geller: You got one, two three, four
- [Chandler is shocked to find out there's more than three]
- Monica Geller: , five, six, and seven!
- Chandler Bing: There are seven?
- Rachel: Let me see that.
- [Monica shows her]
- Rachel: Oh, yeah.
- Chandler Bing: [Points to one] That's one?
- Monica Geller: It's kind of an important one!
- Chandler Bing: Oh, y'know-y'know what, I was looking at it upside down.
- Monica Geller: Now, most guys will hit uh, 1-2-3 and then go to 7 and set up camp.
- Chandler Bing: That-that's bad?
- Monica Geller: Well if you go to Disneyland, you don't spend the whole day on the Matterhorn.
- Chandler Bing: Well, you might if it were anything like 7!
- Monica Geller: All right uh, the important thing is to take your time, you want to hit 'em all, and you mix 'em up. You gotta keep them on their toes.
- Chandler Bing: Oo, toes! Well, for some people.
- [Chandler eyes her and her toes]
- Monica Geller: All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4,
- [Rachel starts getting worked up]
- Monica Geller: 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7.
- Monica Geller: [Starting to yell] 7... 7... 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7! 7!
- [Monica and Rachel both lean back on the couch satisfied]
- Phoebe Buffay: I'm gonna be giving someone the greatest gift you can possibly give!
- Chandler Bing: You're going to carry their child and get them a Sony Playstation?
- Monica Geller: Well big deal, so Joey's had a lot of girlfriends. It doesn't mean that he's great in bed.
- Chandler Bing: We share a wall. So either he's great in bed or she just likes to agree with him a lot.
- Chandler Bing: I know what to do with a woman. It's always nice... I need to know what makes it go from nice to "My God! Somebody's killing her in there!"
- Monica Geller: So, did you do it?
- Chandler Bing: Yes, we had the sex.
- Monica Geller: Uh oh, it was bad?
- Chandler Bing: It was fine, you know, but she didn't agree with me as strongly as she agreed with Joey.