- Carlton Banks: Hey, G, would you make me a sandwich?
- Geoffrey: But, of course.
- Geoffrey: [places a slice of bread on Carlton's head] Now you're a sandwich.
- [after learning that Will and Carlton's prank caused Geoffrey to quit]
- Philip Banks: [to Will] LOOK, YOU BIG-EARED FREELOADER! You take your little square-headed cousin and you go find Geoffrey and you bring him back! Or they will *never find your bodies*!
- [menacingly]
- Philip Banks: And I'm a judge! I can *make it happen*!
- [Will and Carlton take off immediately]
- William 'Will' Smith: [Will and Carlton fake sadness to get Geoffrey home] This is my little brother, Carlton. He knows we can't afford new clothes, so he just doesn't grow!
- Carlton Banks: [to Geoffrey] Daddy, I wanna grow!
- Geoffrey: Ashley, how does a Mercedes sound?
- Ashley Banks: Vroom, vroom.
- Geoffrey: Great! I'll get you two.
- Hilary Banks: Vroom, vroom, vroom!
- Geoffrey: Nice try.
- Geoffrey: [to Uncle Phil] Phillip, I've got a thousand dollars with your name on it. Do the family a favor: get Vivian some cooking lessons.
- William 'Will' Smith: [to Carlton after Uncle Phil yells at him and Carlton] Man, I don't mind him yelling, but does he have to spit?
- [Will turns off Geoffrey's stereo playing the O'Jays song "Money"]
- Geoffrey: You can keep the tape. I'm buying the O'Jays!
- [after thinking he's won the lottery]
- Geoffrey: In case you haven't figured it out... I quit! I QUIT! I QUIT! I QUIT! I QUIT! I QUIT! I QUIT! I QUIT!
- Hilary Banks: It was so sad watching Geoffrey wave as he walked down the driveway.
- William 'Will' Smith: [to Ashley] And luckily you're too young to know what he was waving.
- Ashley Banks: I can't wait to be grown up.
- Vivian Banks: That supermarket was a snake pit. They tried to kick me out of the express lane for being one item over the limit. You'd be surprised how fast you can eat a sponge cake when you have to!