The Flintstones (TV Series)

A Haunted House Is Not a Home (1964)

Alan Reed: Fred Flintstone

Photos 

Quotes 

• Fred Flintstone : [about his uncle]  I don't think I saw him more than twice in my whole life. He, uh, lived alone in a big mansion on Nightmare Hill. He, uh, was kind of a, uh, well, eh, he was a, uh...

  Betty Rubble : You mean he was an eccentric.

  Fred Flintstone : I mean he was a kook, that's what I mean.

• Creepers : Dinner is served, sir.

  Fred Flintstone : Eh, what is it, Creepers?

  Creepers : Alphabet soup, sir, our cook's specialty.

  Fred Flintstone : Alphabet soup?

  Barney Rubble : Sure, Fred, you twirl it around and sometimes it makes words. Uh do you think we should eat it?

  Fred Flintstone : Well, sure, why not?

  Barney Rubble : Well, if anything happens to Flintstone, everything goes to the servants, remember?

  Fred Flintstone : Yeah, yeah, I remember. Hey, Barney, look! The alphabet soup's trying to tell us something! Beware!

  Barney Rubble : You better do what it says, Fred, look!

  [Pot Rock charges at Fred with a cleaver] 

• Barney Rubble : [looking at a picture on the wall]  Hey, that must be a picture of your uncle, the late J. Giggles Flinstone.

  Fred Flintstone : Yeah, yeah that's him alright.

  Barney Rubble : Looks a lot like you!

  [the eyes move in the picture] 

  Fred Flintstone : Hey Barney! That picture, I saw the eyes move!

  Barney Rubble : Eyes move? Oh boy, uh Fred, you're a bundle of nerves!

  Fred Flintstone : [hears thunder and laughter and jumps over to Barney's side of the table]  Kind of, stormy tonight, isn't it, Barney?

• Betty Rubble : Is Pebbles asleep?

  Wilma Flintstone : Uh-huh, sleeping like a little angel.

  Fred Flintstone : [chuckles]  She oughta, the lucky kid. After tomorrow, she's not gonna have a worry in the world.

  Barney Rubble : Oh, I don't know, Fred. She'll still have you.

• [after J. Giggles Flintstone, who turns out to be alive and well, reveals he was merely testing Fred] 

  Fred Flintstone : You mean this was all a joke?

  J. Giggles Flintstone : That's right, a great big joke!

  [cackles] 

  J. Giggles Flintstone : Right, boys?

  Creepers : You're a riot, sir.

  Wormstone : What a practical joker, boss.

  Potrock : Yeah, a real kook.

  J. Giggles Flintstone : That's me, a kook!

  [cackles] 

  J. Giggles Flintstone : But a rich kook. Ha, ha! Don't forget that!

  [cackles] 

  J. Giggles Flintstone : You should've seen how funny you looked when you were scared!

  [cackles] 

  J. Giggles Flintstone : Right, boys?

  Servants : Yeah, boss.

  [the servants all laugh] 

  Fred Flintstone : Well, I'm kind of a kook myself.

  [pulls out a very large cleaver] 

  Fred Flintstone : Not rich, but still a kook.

  [Fred laughs maniacally as his uncle runs in terror] 

  J. Giggles Flintstone : Look out! He's flipped his wheels! Run!

  [the servants flee with Fred chasing after them and Giggles, Barney and the girls watch as Fred continues chasing them outside] 

  Barney Rubble : Good boy! Sic'em, Fred! Sic'em!

  Betty Rubble : Go get'em, Fred!

  [Fred continues his pursuit, laughing maniacally] 

  Wilma Flintstone : Well, back to the poorhouse.