- Carlotta Beck: We might lose Toad Hall, Marshall! Then we'd have to move into a subdivision. Some subdivision where people own vans! Van people, Marshall! The kind who actually believe Betty Crocker is a real person!
- Kathleen Beck: Oh, this is an outrageous amount of money! What if we can't pay?
- Marshall Beck: We'll probably lose Toad Hall.
- Kathleen Beck: Oh well, we just gotta get the money somewhere! I could be out on the streets!
- Carlotta Beck: A good thought, Kathleen, but could you earn that much in so short a time?
- Mother B.: First, the big girl called me a crazy old woman, then Marshall wanted to trick me, then she said I had to get you to pay the taxes on this house, or they were going to send me to a home and bend my fingers all the way back 'til I scream!
- Kathleen Beck: Oh please, why do we always have to play games with each other? Why can't we just be honest about our needs and our wants? Honesty is a goal we should all strive for!
- Carlotta Beck: Save it, Kathleen. This is not the talent portion of The Miss Tennessee Walking Horse Pageant.
- Bootsie Weschester: I hope you're not doing business before you've had a nourishing breakfast including, hopefully, each of the four basic food groups. Decisions made without a proper breakfast can lead to awful disasters! It's a well-known historical fact that before Little Bighorn, General Custer ate no breakfast... Well, maybe a cinnamon bun.
- Carlotta Beck: What makes you think I'm gonna let little runny-nosed, dirty-necked, pubescent brats tromp through this house every Tuesday and Thursday?
- Bootsie Weschester: Well, because on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, we're open to the general public.
- Kathleen Beck: I know this is a private bedroom.
- Carlotta Beck: Good. Then take your fat, overglossed lips and get out.
- Marshall Beck: We could make some money.
- Carlotta Beck: This sounds just about as brilliant as some of your ideas. Like mood shoes that light up when you're happy. That was so incredibly stupid!