Family Guy (TV Series)

To Love and Die in Dixie (2001)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Tom Tucker, Announcer, Virgil, Willie Tanner, Pope, Agent Harris, Clerk, Alf, ATM Cashier, Dixie DJ

Photos 

Quotes 

• Peter Griffin : I dunno, Brian, maybe Lois is right. Maybe it is time for me to get a job.

  Brian Griffin : Yeah, too bad you always blow it in the interview.

  [Peter is seen at a job interview] 

  Interviewer : Okay, Peter, where do you see yourself in five years?

  Peter Griffin : [thinking]  Don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife, don't say doing your wife.

  Peter Griffin : [out loud]  Doing your...

  [sees a picture of the interviewer's son] 

  Peter Griffin : son?

• [Peter and Brian have just jumped their car off a flatbed truck like The Dukes of Hazzard] 

  Peter Griffin : Oh, man. That was great. Hey, maybe next time we can get Meg to be Boss Hogg and Chris can be Anus.

  Brian Griffin : Enis.

  Peter Griffin : What'd I say?

  Brian Griffin : Anus.

  [Peter laughs hysterically] 

• Peter Griffin : [clearing his throat]  Excuse me but I'm pretty sure the north won the war.

  [dead silence] 

• Stewie Griffin : [playing Banjo and Singing]  Heard her on my C.B. said her name was Mimi, sounded like an angel come to Earth.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Come to Earth.

  Stewie Griffin : [singing]  But when i went to meet her, boy you should have seen her, twice as big as me, three times the girth.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Times the Girth.

  Stewie Griffin : [singing]  Oh my big baby loves to eat.

  Hillbilly Band : [singing]  Loves to eat.

  Stewie Griffin : A big old Budda belly and breasts way past her feet. Oh my big baby loves to e-e-eat, my big old fat-ass baby loves to eat.

  [finishes playing] 

  Stewie Griffin : I've got blisters on me fingers!

• Peter Griffin : Hey uh Lois, I don't get how this works. It's just a hole. I don't think it goes anywhere. No, it definitely doesn't go anywhere.

  [Bird hits the outhouse, knocking it over] 

  Peter Griffin : Ugh! Oh God! It's everywhere! Ugh! It's in my raccoon wounds! Oh God!

• Meg Griffin : [opening the closet door]  Someone's in the closet!

  Jeff Foxworthy : You know you're a redneck when your gun rack has a gun rack on it.

  Stewie Griffin : You suck!

  [slams the closet door shut] 

• Lois Griffin : [the Griffin family first enter their new dilapidated house]  Ughhh, what's that smell?

  Brian Griffin : It's either bad meat or good cheese.

• Peter Griffin : Deep south? Isn't that the place where the black guys are really lazy and the white guys are just as lazy, but they're mad at the black for being so lazy?