Eerie, Indiana (TV Series)
Zombies in P.J.s (1992)
John Astin: Radford
Quotes
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Radford : I forgot to pay my income tax. For twelve years. Mea culpa, already! It slipped my mind.
Simon Holmes : It's an honest mistake. I'm sure they'd understand.
Radford : Understand? The IRS? They are ruthless, heartless bureaucrats with one goal in life: making me pay. Why, the average IRS agent would make the Devil Himself seem like Mr Rogers.
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IRS Man : [introducing himself to Radford] Internal Revenue Service.
Radford : [looking like he's about to pass out] I - I - I - I - I R S?
IRS Man : [laughing gently] We have an audit to go to. Um, it seems you haven't filed a return since 1979.
Radford : Do I have a choice here? Couldn't I just go straight to Hell instead?
IRS Man : Sorry, Mr. Radford, but your trip will have to wait. I'll be needing all your store receipts.
Dash X : But he doesn't have them.
[slowly turns to the Donald and points at him]
Dash X : HE does
The Donald : [nervously] But... but these are mine! These... these are MY contracts!
IRS Man : [sternly goes to his face and holds a card] Maybe you didn't hear me. Internal Revenue Service?
The Donald : [goes afraid and stammers uncontrollably] Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba...
[Dash X takes the briefcase away from the Donald and tosses it to Radford, who tosses it to Simon]
Simon Holmes : [gives the briefcase to the IRS man] Here you go, sir. I'd like you to know that Mr. Radford was cooperating fully in this matter.
IRS Man : Thank you.
The Donald : [stammering turns to crying] NO! NO! NO! NO!
[the Donald gets sucked down to the fiery underground as the IRS man smiles triumphantly]