Clueless (TV Series)

Driving Me Crazy (1996)

David Lascher: Josh

Quotes 

• Josh : [Cher scoffs as he enters]  Hey, Cher, I hear you're bringing your redecorating skills to the city property now.

  Cher Horowitz : [gets up, wounded tone]  I'm glad you find my vehicular shortcomings so amusing.

  Josh : Aw, look, Cher, come on, everybody has something like that when they first start out. You know, I never told anybody, but the first time Mel took me out...

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Is that the time you bumped topiary incident? I think I heard about that.

  Cher Horowitz : [to Josh]  Well, Mel was ranting about it for days after you left for your Mom's.

  Josh : [sighs]  The point is, why don't I take you out for a couple of lessons, you know? I know Mel could be a hothead.

  Cher Horowitz : [sighs]  Josh, that's way Mother Teresa of you... but I'm not getting behind a wheel. I'm a complete driving doofus.

  Josh : [sighs]  Well, I'm... I'm here if you need me. Just let me know.

  [gets up, leaves] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Observation.

  [gets up] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Maybe the stepbrother is right. I mean, it's probably our respective instructors. I bet, if we went and took our tests, we would so fully be in the passing lane.

  Cher Horowitz : [scoffs uncertainly]  Maybe you.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No, both of us. I know. If we went down tomorrow and took our tests, we would so fully pass.

• Josh : [entering]  How's the pedestrian?

  Cher Horowitz : Josh, it's not funny.

  Josh : Oh, look, Cher, I really think you're making too much of this. Everybody fails that test, you know?

  [sits down next to her on bed] 

  Josh : I failed it the first time I took it.

  Cher Horowitz : Really?

  Josh : No. No, not really. I was just trying to make you feel better. But look what this is doing to you, Cher, you can't let this happen. Come on, I'll go take you out for a drive right now.

  Cher Horowitz : I can't...

  Josh : Yes, you can! I'll be right next to you.

  [takes her hand, pulls her along] 

  Josh : Come on, you're gonna do great!

• Josh : [as they drive along in his Jeep]  Look, Cher, you can do it. Hands on wheel, gas, go!

  Cher Horowitz : No, I can't.

  Josh : All right, I'll tell you what. You'll just drive from one Starbucks to the next, that's got to be, what, about two hundred feet?

  Cher Horowitz : Josh, it's no use. Look, I appreciate it, but I'm just one of those hopeless cases.

  [he sighs, and then she spots something:] 

  Cher Horowitz : Josh, stop the car!

  Josh : Why? Do you wanna drive?

  Cher Horowitz : No, pull over, it's a hurt dog, stop the car! Pull over!

  [car stops next to limping English sheep-dog, she scurries over] 

  Cher Horowitz : Oh, you poor thing!

  [dog whines] 

  Cher Horowitz : Oh, his name is Buster. Oh, we're gonna take care of you, okay?

  [struggling to pick up the big dog, grunts] 

  Cher Horowitz : Josh, help us, I can't carry him, he's too heavy.

  [running to the Jeep] 

  Cher Horowitz : Hurry!

  [climbing in behind the wheel] 

  Cher Horowitz : Hurry!

• Josh : [Cher steering the Jeep through city traffic as Josh holds the dog, to the tune of To Dream The Impossible Dream]  You know what you're doing?

  Cher Horowitz : [glancing at him]  I'm taking Buster to the vet!

  Josh : No, Cher, you're driving!

  Cher Horowitz : I am?

  [realizes:] 

  Cher Horowitz : I am!

  [laughs, and her smiling face becomes her driver's ID]