- Venus: [a package has arrived at the Joker's hideout] What's inside, Joker? $2,000 is a lot of money.
- The Joker: Ah, this merchandise is worth $2,000!
- The Penguin: [popping out of box] It's worth 200,000! You cheapskate. At least you could have sent me a plane ticket!
- The Joker: Oh ho, we had to get you into Gotham City without anyone knowing about it, Pengy. Especially Batman.
- The Penguin: Well, you better have have something good cooked up for that caped creep.
- The Joker: Oh, oh, oh, don't you worry, Pengy. The pot's being put on the fire right now and Batman's in it!
- [laughs]
- The Penguin: Oh, you are a man after my own heart, Joker!
- The Joker: Ah, Black, eh?
- The Penguin: Black as pitch!
- [both laugh]
- Commissioner Gordon: With this map, and our improved criminal procedures, we should be well on our way to putting all of Gotham City's criminals behind bars.
- The Joker: [Joker appears, sitting in the Commissioner's window] Never mind the bars, look to the stars! Not to mention Venus and Mars.
- [laughs]
- Venus: Couldn't we call it off, Joker? "Mercy to a brave foe", and all that?
- The Joker: You're losing your nerve, Venus. Which is a shame. But you're also losing your senses, which is criminal! Hold her.
- [laughs as his goons grab Venus by the arms]
- Venus: [turns to the imperiled Batman] Batman, I realize right now: I've made a terrible mistake.
- Batman: Repence is better late than never, Venus.
- The Joker: [pulls a face of disgust] Eew! You're making me ill! Ech.
- Commissioner Gordon: What do you want here, Joker?
- The Joker: Oh, just passing the time. Just I did all those long months in prison, after those caped cabbage-heads were lucky enough to defeat me!
- Commissioner Gordon: Luck had nothing to do with it, Joker! Your warped criminal mind is no match for the wits of Batman and Robin! They'll outsmart you every time.
- The Joker: A stroke of luck, I tell you!