- Aunt Harriet Cooper: [enjoying Chad and Jeremy's performance] Very hep, Alfred.
- Dick Grayson: It's 'hip', Aunt Harriet, they changed it.
- Batman: All right, Belgoody, tell me everything.
- Benton Belgoody: Every... well, I, I was born in Youngstown of poor but honest parents.
- Batman: Come off it, Bellgoody, you're pulling my boot! What's Catwoman's plan?
- Robin: Don Ho, what are you doing here?
- Don Ho: Well, I came back to get some land we lost back in Hawaii.
- Batman: And to do a little singing here in Gotham City, I hope.
- Don Ho: Well, I brought my most important prop along. It's gotten me as far as your Batropes have gotten you. Yeah, I think I'll introduce Batropes in Hawaii. Pick coconuts more easy that way.
- Batman: I'd like to sit here and chat with you all day, Don, but...
- Robin: The surfs coming up and we gotta catch a big one.
- Don Ho: Okay, fellas, I understand. Aloha.
- Batman, Robin: Aloha.
- Batman: [appearing on the Allan Stevens Television show] America must have faith that the law will recover the voices of Chad and Jeremy.
- Allan Stevens: Yes, I understand that millions of the world's teenagers are in virtual mourning since last night's tragedy.
- Batman: Yes, that's quite true, Mr. Stevens, but on the plus side, millions of parents are delighted.
- Robin: . Speaking as an average, ordinary, red-blooded, typical American teenager, I think this is one of the worst things that could have happened!
- Catwoman: Batman, why for art thou doing this to me?
- Batman: It's my job, Catwoman.
- Catwoman: We could make such beautiful music together...
- Robin: You'll play a different tune when we're through with you. And all the notes will be sour.
- Catwoman: Party pooper. Teenagers should be seen and not heard. All right, men, destroy the Dynamic Duo!
- Batman: By this time, Sir Sterling, you're aware of the serious tragedy affecting your countries most popular export?
- Sir Sterling Habits: Have we stopped making those small sports cars?
- Robin: We're referring to Chad and Jeremy.
- Sir Sterling Habits: Oh yes, those blighters. Hm. Can't understand a word they say...
- Catwoman: Chad and Jeremy pay so much income tax to their native land that if it were to stop, the whole empire might crumble and the British Pound would be deflated.
- Batman: What is it you want, Catwoman?
- Catwoman: Eight million pounds for the return of their voices.
- Allan Stevens: Eight million pounds of what? Chicken fat?
- [Catwoman points her gun at him]
- Allan Stevens: Sorry I asked.