- [introduction]
- Alfred Hitchcock: [With his hands thumbs up and on the lapels of his suit, Hitchcock faces the camera and paces back and forth as if he is arguing a case in a courtroom] Good evening. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the first case on today's docket is entitled "Malice Domestic." I hasten to add, however, that "Malice Domestic" is not about the servant problem, nor is it a puff for imported wines. It is concerned with some mysterious doings in a family of three: Carl Borden, his wife Annette, and their charming dog, Cassandra. To give you a clearer picture of exactly what happened, we now transport you to the scene of the crime where we shall reenact it.
- [afterword]
- Alfred Hitchcock: [Hitchcock points dramatically at the audience for a second] You are all wondering, no doubt, how Carl Borden ended up in the jug. It is quite simple. His dog, Cassandra, was really a detective in disguise and turned him in at the next town. It's getting so a man can't even trust his best friend. This concludes this session of our little court of inhuman relations.
- [Hitchcock slicks back his er, hair, briefly]
- Alfred Hitchcock: I hope you will rejoin us when we next present a different case. Good night.
- [last lines]
- Carl Borden: I took a big chance, baby, but it worked. The first time I wasn't too sick because I just took a small dose of arsenic. But that second time, oh, oh. That second time you almost lost me altogether. I tell you, I was as sick as a dog.