The Addams Family (TV Series)
Lurch Learns to Dance (1964)
John Astin: Gomez Addams
Photos
Quotes
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[Gomez tries teaching Lurch to tango]
Gomez Addams : What's wrong, Lurch?
Lurch : You didn't shave.
Gomez Addams : Señoritas never do.
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[the dance instructress faints at the sight of Puglsey's toad]
Gomez : Pugsley, take your toad out of here. Things like this upset him.
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Lurch : I'm a wallflower.
Gomez Addams : What?
Lurch : I can't dance.
Gomez Addams : Oh, it's so simple. You can learn in no time.
[snapping his fingers in time]
Gomez Addams : Come, and trip it as you go, On the light fantastic toe. Shakespeare!
Morticia Addams : [snaps her fingers] Milton!
Gomez Addams : By Jove, you're right.
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Morticia : Look at Mr. Addams. He's always developing outside interests.
Gomez Addams : Right now I have the most enviable collection of coroner reports in the neighborhood.
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[Gomez spots Lurch, dragging in the dance instructress who fainted at the door at the sight of him]
Gomez Addams : Great form, Lurch, but you're not keeping time to the music.
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Morticia Addams : Dear, I can't find Lurch.
Gomez Addams : Ah, he did seem depressed by all that Butlers' Ball talk.
Morticia Addams : You don't suppose he did anything drastic, do you?
Gomez Addams : Of course not, otherwise your little vulture would be circling the area.
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Gomez Addams : Little Pugsley has the nose of a bloodhound. As a matter of fact, it's his best feature.
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Gomez Addams : Mrs. Addams won the Twist Award at the Funeral Directors' Ball. They awarded her The Silver Urn.
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Morticia Addams : Well, should we call for another instructress?
Gomez Addams : Waste of smelling salts.
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Wednesday Addams : He must have thrown his back out.
Gomez Addams : Excellent diagnosis, child!
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Gomez Addams : We must not indulge fear. I remember my Cousin Blob, deathly afraid of ghosts.
Morticia Addams : Ghosts?
Gomez Addams : Now he's one himself.
Morticia Addams : Ah yes... I hear him on dark, stormy nights.
Gomez Addams : Oh darling, those strange sounds from the attic aren't Cousin Blob.
Morticia Addams : No?
Gomez Addams : They're Grandma Squint. You can tell from her superb cackle.
Morticia Addams : Ah yes... like music to my ears.
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Gomez Addams : I promised them a large contribution to their pet charity.
Morticia Addams : How nice of them to have charities for pets.