Night at the Museum (2006)

Owen Wilson: Jedediah

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Jedediah : No problemo, Gigantor.

  Larry : Um, my name's Larry, first of all okay, Jed? See, I call you Jed, I don't call you tiny, right?

  Jedediah : What's that supposed to mean?

  Larry : Hey teeny, how does that sound?

  Jedediah : I... I don't like it. It hurts my feelings.

  Larry : Okay, well Gigantor makes me feel like some sort of freak.

  Octavius : I don't. I just call you Larry.

  Larry : Don't be a kiss-ass.

• Jedediah : Fire up the iron horse, boys.

  Larry : Hey, blondie!

  Jedediah : Name's Jedadiah.

  Larry : Alright, Jedadiah, stop the train, please!

  Jedediah : Big no can do, crackerjack.

  Larry : What's going on here, huh?

  Jedediah : Somebody's got to pay.

  Larry : Pay for what?

  Jedediah : I don't know, just pay! Now stop whining and just take it like a man!

  Larry : Seriously, stop the train!

  Jedediah : Alright, stop the train.

  Larry : Thank you.

  Jedediah : [shouts]  Now full speed ahead and ram 'im! Split his head like a watermelon!

  Larry : [Train hits Larry in the face]  Ooh! Ow...

  Jedediah : Oh, for crying out loud!

• Larry : I'm trusting you guys, alright? And if you don't do what I say, you'll end up like your little buddies in the Mayan world over there, locked up. Take a look. Do they look happy?

  [Shows a display with bars across it] 

  Jedediah : [Shakes head]  No. They look sad.

• Jedadiah : I'm gonna shoot you in your dang eye. In your dadgum eye.

  [gun clicks empty] 

  Larry : Yeah. Keep shootin'. Nothing's gonna happen.

  Jedadiah : Now you know my shame. Jedediah's impotent rage. His guns don't fire. Take me away.

• [Jed and Octavius are popping Cecil's tires, and they are about to be blown away] 

  Octavius : Save yourself!

  Jedediah : [holding on to Octavius]  I ain't quittin' you!

• Jedediah : I told you, I don't like to be manhandled!

  Larry : No, I will manhandle you, Jedediah! Now listen, guys, what is your problem, huh? Why can't you just get along?

  Jedediah : Look, we're men. We fight, okay? That's what we do!

  Octavius : It's kinda how we pass the time.

• Jedediah : [discussing why he needs to blow up his display]  It's Manifest Destiny!

• Jedediah : Wait, no sir, I ain't working with Toga Boy!

  Octavius : Romans work alone.

  [Jedediah hits him on his foot with his rifle] 

  Octavius : Ow!

  Jedediah : That didn't hurt, don't be a baby.

  Octavius : [while hopping on one foot]  Yes it did!

  Jedediah : No it didn't! Come on!

  Octavius : [then hits Jedediah's behind with his sword] 

  Jedediah : Ow! That was much harder!

• Jedediah : Whoa, Octavius, hold on! This ain't your fight. This here giant's on our land.

• Jedediah : Just living the Dream, Baby!

• [last lines] 

  Jedediah : Let's ride.