- Narrator: Hayley and David went all the way through high school together. After that, they went their separate ways. Ten years after college, they met again. At that meeting, just like the first time he had ever had a chance to talk to her in grade school, David was so nervous he couldn't speak, so she spoke for him, and she said, ''You're supposed to say, "'Will you marry me?'" And he did.
- Singleton: You're out!
- Mac: Are you cracked? What'd you do that for? You jive turkey!
- Singleton: She wanted to play with the big boys, that's what she gets!
- David Durango: [punches Singleton in the face after Singleton hits Hayley] The Sandlot's ours, forever! Don't mess up my teammates! You never, ever hit a girl, creep!
- Johnnie Smalls: I'm really sorry, Hayley. I'll be sure to take all the blame.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Can I ask you something?
- Johnnie Smalls: Sure, I guess.
- Hayley Goodfairer: It's just... Where's David? I thought he'd come back 'cause, you know, I thought he... Never mind. Forget it. It's stupid.
- Johnnie Smalls: It's not stupid. He does.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Does what?
- Johnnie Smalls: Likes you.
- Hayley Goodfairer: He does?
- Johnnie Smalls: Duh.
- Hayley Goodfairer: But, he never said...
- Johnnie Smalls: Boys don't do that. Did you ever tell him?
- Hayley Goodfairer: [thinks about it, then shakes her head "no"] Could you tell him for me?
- Johnnie Smalls: Why?
- Hayley Goodfairer: 'Cause he's like the fastest boy I've ever seen and I just thought... Forget it. It's stupid.
- Johnnie Smalls: No, it's not stupid. Stay here. I'll be back.
- [Hayley watches Johnnie leave]
- Singleton: [sees the Sandlot kids] Hey, look guys, it's the Sandlot retards!
- Little League Coach: Singleton, that's enough, son. Let's get back to practice.
- Singleton: Yeah, in a second, Coach.
- Little League Coach: But you said that last time, then we all stood around while you cussed out the ice cream man!
- Mac McKing: You're a fart-sniffing, road-apple-chewing, scab-licking female dog!
- Singleton: Well, you...
- Mac McKing: I ain't done yet! You're ugly, your mama dresses you funny, you stink like toe fungus and you ride the short school bus!
- Narrator: We were out of ideas and I was dead meat until Mac had an epiphany, which, since it was such a girlie word, he didn't have many of.
- Mac McKing: Wow! What's that? Up there. That speck.
- Saul: [Finger signs to Saul] It's not a UFO, meathead.
- [looks at the speck]
- Saul: Wait, is it?
- Hayley Goodfairer: It looks exactly like... Johnny, please. Please! Tell me you didn't send up my dad's rocket!
- Johnnie Smalls: It was an accident. I swear!
- [Fingers approaches a kissing booth wearing platform boots to make him appear taller than normal]
- Hot Young Lady: Sweetie, aren't you a little young?
- [Fingers shakes his head while keeping a straight face]
- Boyfriend: Hey, kid. Did your mother say it was okay?
- [Fingers nods with a cunning grin on his face]
- Hot Young Lady: Just on the cheek, ok?
- [Fingers nods again and leans in to get a kiss; he then kisses the kissing booth woman on the lips as the security guard attempts to restrain him. The other kids get off a ride as they spot Fingers being restrained]
- Saul: Oh my god!
- Tarqell: What's wrong?
- Saul: Get the bikes!
- [the kids scramble to get the bikes as Fingers is successfully apprehended by the security guard]
- Hot Young Lady: Now I remember that kid! That's the same kid as last year.
- [the kids each get on their bikes and pedal to the rescue; Fingers managed to successfully break free and takes off]
- Boyfriend: [tosses Finger's hat towards him] Pervert!
- Hot Young Lady: God; he stole my gum!
- [Fingers is seen riding in Saul's sidecar with the Hot Young Lady's gum in his mouth]
- Narrator: [narrating] We never mentioned that night again because it was just too terrible to think what would've happened if that guy had caught Fingers. But mostly, because of what happened the next day.
- [the team are having cookies and lemonade in the dugout]
- Saul: Sammy says the cookies are great.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Thank you!
- Saul: Can he have the recipe?
- Hayley Goodfairer: Sure. I'll write it down for you.
- Saul: [observing the changes the girls made to the dugout] The dugout's very tastefully done.
- Jenny, Penny: Thanks.
- David Durango: [sternly] Saul.
- Saul: What?
- David Durango: [whispers] Shut up.
- Tarqell: [observing the orange decor of the dugout] Orange *is* my favorite color.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Mine too!
- [David kicks Tarqell]
- Tarqell: Ow! What?
- [Penny looks at David funny]
- Mac McKing: [referring to the lemonade Hayley made] Is this freshly squeezed?
- Hayley Goodfairer: Yes, thank you for noticing.
- David Durango: Mac!
- Mac McKing: What?
- David Durango: [whispers] Shut it.
- Hayley Goodfairer: [introduces herself and her teammates] Anyway, this is Jenny and this is Penny and I'm...
- Mac McKing, David Durango, Tarqell, Johnnie Smalls, Saul: [interrupting; annoyed] Hayley Goodfairer; we know.
- David Durango: [introducing the boys] This is Tarqell, Mac, Saul, and his brother, Sam. We call him "Fingers". He's deaf. Just look at him when you talk to him. He can read lips.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Ok.
- [whispers and waves at Fingers]
- Hayley Goodfairer: Hi.
- Tarqell: [observing the orange decor of the dugout] Orange *is* my favorite color.
- Hayley Goodfairer: Mine too!
- Mac McKing: [When Johnnie lifts up the lantern to show the skull] Do you know what that looks like?
- Jenny: We see it, Mac, now shut up!
- [Goliath growls and there's a bunch of noise]
- Mac McKing: Did you guys hear that?
- Penny: [Penny and Jenny grab each other] We heard it, Mac, now shut up!
- David Durango: [after being chased by The Great Fear and jumping over the junkyard fence and landing on the cement] Oh, shiit!
- [a good solider know when to surrender. I surrender]
- [first lines]
- Narrator: It began with the retrieval of the Great Ball... Stolen by the Beast, the monster poured into its possession his slobber and his will to dominate all who trespassed his land... But, there were some who resisted. An alliance of neighborhood kids banded together and fought for possession of the Great Ball... When all seemed lost, Benny ''The Jet'' Rodriguez aided by magic shoes guaranteed to make a kid run faster and jump higher, battled for the future of the Sandlot... Hercules the Beast, enemy of all free kids was finally defeated... Time passed, and for 3,000 days... the Great Ball, its retrieval and the danger of what was once contained behind the left field fence, was almost forgotten... Rumors grew up about a shadow of the Beast... Finally, when nine new kids came to the Sandlot in the year 1972... something old and new was waiting... I was the only one that knew anything about it. My name is Johnny Smalls, and that was the summer that a kid named David Vincent Durango, taught me the greatest lesson in life, and became the very first hero I ever knew. But even though what happened that summer happened on the Sandlot... it had nothing to do with baseball.
- [David and Mac began to grab Singleton's arms]
- David Durango: It's payback time, you little turd!
- Johnnie Smalls: It was an accident!
- Mac McKing: Your wrecked our field! Now, your ass is grass!
- Johnnie Smalls: What? I cleaned it up, I made it better!