Nick and Jessicas Variety Hour.
For real, these self-obsessed, obscene excuses for human beings, made a 60's style song and dance Variety Hour with skits and guest stars like Mr. T., Kit, Jewel, Johnny Bench and The Muppets. Now, there were a few moments in this episode that transcended the ridiculously awful and became sublimely entertaining. These moments are as follows: 1. The Duet with Jewel and Jessica singing Who Will Save your soul? Indeed, who would dare save their souls? The overly-exaggerated body jerking that Jessica does while she sings her spot on rendition of the song is absolutely surreal. And the vague pathetic smile on Jewels face as she sees this slaughter of her creation, is equally exhilarating. Is Jewel actually contemplating ending it all? It must feel like a pretty insane moment of existential turpitude. If she ever believed in her art, watching Jessica Simpson mock it perfectly must have destroyed that.
2. Nick Lachey,(ex-boy band member) and Kit(talking car from Knight Rider) sing... a duet.... And the car CRIES... Seriously.
3. "My name is Nick Lachey and I want to shave you." Some kind of bizarre skit that is supposed to be a commercial, in which Nick Lachey offers to shave you at home, for a price. Seriously.
4. Finally, the only acceptable and truly enjoyable ten seconds of this show came in the form of "Ten Seconds of Uncomfortable Silence With Mr. T." Aside from these moments. Nick and Jessica's Variety Hour was one of the worst television viewing experiences of my life.
May God have mercy on our souls.
For real, these self-obsessed, obscene excuses for human beings, made a 60's style song and dance Variety Hour with skits and guest stars like Mr. T., Kit, Jewel, Johnny Bench and The Muppets. Now, there were a few moments in this episode that transcended the ridiculously awful and became sublimely entertaining. These moments are as follows: 1. The Duet with Jewel and Jessica singing Who Will Save your soul? Indeed, who would dare save their souls? The overly-exaggerated body jerking that Jessica does while she sings her spot on rendition of the song is absolutely surreal. And the vague pathetic smile on Jewels face as she sees this slaughter of her creation, is equally exhilarating. Is Jewel actually contemplating ending it all? It must feel like a pretty insane moment of existential turpitude. If she ever believed in her art, watching Jessica Simpson mock it perfectly must have destroyed that.
2. Nick Lachey,(ex-boy band member) and Kit(talking car from Knight Rider) sing... a duet.... And the car CRIES... Seriously.
3. "My name is Nick Lachey and I want to shave you." Some kind of bizarre skit that is supposed to be a commercial, in which Nick Lachey offers to shave you at home, for a price. Seriously.
4. Finally, the only acceptable and truly enjoyable ten seconds of this show came in the form of "Ten Seconds of Uncomfortable Silence With Mr. T." Aside from these moments. Nick and Jessica's Variety Hour was one of the worst television viewing experiences of my life.
May God have mercy on our souls.
