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Perhaps the worst movie ever made.
Where to start? The incredibly horrible writing? The insanely bad acting? Even the scoring is terrible. The only saving grace of this movie is that it is mercifully short, coming in at just under 45 minutes.
The movie begins with a pointless dream sequence featuring Michelle Montgomery playing a completely unconvincing "Athena". She clumsily rides a horse over to save Aaron (he's just laying there... maybe she's saving him from dying of exposure, eventually). She clumsily puts aside her sword, which she handles as she would a giant banana, and comes to his side. The dream sequence ends and Aaron wakes up. Despite many cuts to an "Athena" poster throughout the movie, the opening sequence serves no purpose. It's clear that they intended to tie Aaron's imagination to his father's, but they failed miserably.
Steve Davis, a great real-life Elvis impersonator, plays Edward J. Kelly... an Elvis impersonator. The entire show is a flaccid build-up to Ed Kelly's appearance at his son's grade school. Aaron Kelly, Ed's son, tells one shallow lie after another on his way to school in an effort to keep his dad from coming to class and to explain his dad's absence. Ed makes his appearance in class, complete with a dream sequence Elvis show, and Aaron runs off. Ed catches Aaron along the side of the road and has a shallow heart-to-heart, with the aid of two police officers. It ends soon after, as Ed sends Aaron back to school. Does Aaron learn anything? Not really. For a movie that purports to be about a kid coming to grips with his dad's profession, and the embarrassment that it causes him, it falls completely flat. It ends where it should begin.
Jessica Campbell (Election, Freaks and Geeks) is completely wasted as the friend of Aaron's sister. She, and other far less talented actors, move into and out of the movie for no reason. For example, there is a guy who pulls up in front of Aaron's house as Aaron looks for his bicycle (by far, the most painful scene of the movie). He speaks in lousy Italian as his daughter translates. His daughter has a crush on Aaron, as does many of the girls-- another completely unexplored connection to his father that the film makers probably thought themselves quite clever to toss in.
I'm sad to say that this is a St. Louis shot and produced movie, using pretty much all local "talent". It would be a shame if the film industry saw this as in any way representative of what this city is capable of producing. Hopefully the industry will look at films like The Big Brass Ring (1999) rather than this after school special wannabe.
If you get a chance to see this movie, consider taking a nap instead.
The movie begins with a pointless dream sequence featuring Michelle Montgomery playing a completely unconvincing "Athena". She clumsily rides a horse over to save Aaron (he's just laying there... maybe she's saving him from dying of exposure, eventually). She clumsily puts aside her sword, which she handles as she would a giant banana, and comes to his side. The dream sequence ends and Aaron wakes up. Despite many cuts to an "Athena" poster throughout the movie, the opening sequence serves no purpose. It's clear that they intended to tie Aaron's imagination to his father's, but they failed miserably.
Steve Davis, a great real-life Elvis impersonator, plays Edward J. Kelly... an Elvis impersonator. The entire show is a flaccid build-up to Ed Kelly's appearance at his son's grade school. Aaron Kelly, Ed's son, tells one shallow lie after another on his way to school in an effort to keep his dad from coming to class and to explain his dad's absence. Ed makes his appearance in class, complete with a dream sequence Elvis show, and Aaron runs off. Ed catches Aaron along the side of the road and has a shallow heart-to-heart, with the aid of two police officers. It ends soon after, as Ed sends Aaron back to school. Does Aaron learn anything? Not really. For a movie that purports to be about a kid coming to grips with his dad's profession, and the embarrassment that it causes him, it falls completely flat. It ends where it should begin.
Jessica Campbell (Election, Freaks and Geeks) is completely wasted as the friend of Aaron's sister. She, and other far less talented actors, move into and out of the movie for no reason. For example, there is a guy who pulls up in front of Aaron's house as Aaron looks for his bicycle (by far, the most painful scene of the movie). He speaks in lousy Italian as his daughter translates. His daughter has a crush on Aaron, as does many of the girls-- another completely unexplored connection to his father that the film makers probably thought themselves quite clever to toss in.
I'm sad to say that this is a St. Louis shot and produced movie, using pretty much all local "talent". It would be a shame if the film industry saw this as in any way representative of what this city is capable of producing. Hopefully the industry will look at films like The Big Brass Ring (1999) rather than this after school special wannabe.
If you get a chance to see this movie, consider taking a nap instead.
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- Cappomutato
- Jun 12, 2004
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- Runtime56 minutes
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