Reno 911! (2003– )

Michael Ian Black: Chris, Hatzolah Commander, Hatzolah Captain, Kevin the Sex Offender, Miss Mertz, Organ Dealer, Time Traveler

Photos 

Quotes 

• Kevin the Sex Offender : Morning, my name's Kevin Darling, I'm moving in next door, just thought I'd come by and tell you a little bit about myself. I'm, uh, divorced... in between jobs, somewhat of a foodie, convicted sex offender, I, I, I play chess not very well...

  Deputy Clementine Johnson : No, back up to the...

  Kevin the Sex Offender : The other thing?

  Deputy Clementine Johnson : Yeah, that's right.

  Kevin the Sex Offender : I am a foodie, and so I cook a lot.

  Deputy Clementine Johnson : No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't be cute, Kevin.

  Kevin the Sex Offender : I am a convicted sex offender. Whatever that means.

  Deputy Clementine Johnson : What that means, ma'am, is you've got a pervert living in your neighborhood.