Man of the House (I) (2005)

Vanessa Ferlito: Heather

Photos 

Quotes 

• Teresa : [Sharp has a pizza delivered at dinner, while the girls all have homemade salads]  What is that?

  Roland Sharp : The Carnivore. Pepperoni, sausage, ground beef, ham and olive loaf all gathered together in one savory pie. With jalepenos. Want some?

  Heather : Yes. No!

  Roland Sharp : Extra thick crust.

  Anne : I can't, I'm on the zone.

  Roland Sharp : What zone?

  Anne : The proper combination of protein, fat and carbohydrates.

  Roland Sharp : This combination here is proper as hell.

  Barb : I'm a total Atkins girl.

  Evie : I'm on Weight Watchers, you'll probably blow all your daily points with just one bite.

  Roland Sharp : This baby has one point and one point only, and that is tasting good.

• Heather : [Barb is playing with her breasts in front of a mirror in an interrogation room]  That is a two-way mirror, girl. People are watching you!

  Barb : I know!

• Anne : No, he means the other Texas Rangers, you know, like The Lone Ranger.

  Heather : He had that cool Indian friend, what was his name?

  Teresa : Tonto?

  Barb : He was hot! Why don't guys wear loincloths anymore?

• Heather : ...like in "Full Metal Jacket"? That's my favorite movie.

  Roland Sharp : My favorite movie is "The Sound of Music."

• Roland Sharp : You're not really the cheerleading type, are you?

  Heather : For me, it's more penance than a passion. Religious ascetics wear a hair shirt, I carry the pom-poms. I don't know. I guess it's the duality of man, you know. "That Jungian thing, sir," Matthew Modine, Full Metal Jacket. Peace sign on one side of his helmet. "Born to Kill" on the other. It's my favorite movie.

• Anne : Look, you guys, we've got a game on Saturday...

  Evie : Yeah!

  Anne : ...and don't even think about telling us we're not going!

  Roland Sharp : You're not going!

  Heather : [urgent whisper]  Tell him, Anne.

  Anne : As captain of the squad, it is my duty to inform you that if you wanna stop us from cheerleading,

  [folds arms] 

  Anne : you're gonna have to pry the pom-poms from our cold dead hands.

• Teresa : [advising Roland]  Remember, a woman is like a horse. She likes to know that the guy on the saddle has a tight grip on the reins.

  Heather : [frowns]  Excuse me, a woman is not a horse.

  [to Roland:] 

  Heather : Just be yourself.

  Anne : [smiling]  I'm not so sure that being himself is going in the right direction.