She Spies (2002–2004)

Natasha Henstridge: Cassie McBain

Photos 

87 more photos

Quotes 

• Jack Wilde : In regards to our roles, maybe we should be wacky siblings?

  Cassie McBain : Can we still be married?

  Jack Wilde : In certain parts of Kentucky and West Virginia. And for anyone from those lovely states who might have overheard, I was of course making a joke.

• Jack Wilde : If he gets those hands on those trade secrets the livelihoods of thousands of factory workers are at stake.

  Cassie McBain : So is this another one of those conversations where we both know all these things but for some reason we have to say them out loud?

  Jack Wilde : Yeah, I guess so.

• Cassie McBain : There are things I'd rather be doing than dying.

  Shane Phillips : Playing miniature golf.

  Cassie McBain : Wallpapering the guest bedroom.

  Shane Phillips : Watching the second season of 'The Bachelor.'

  [pause] 

  Shane Phillips : Nah.

  Cassie McBain : Rather be dying.

• D.D. Cummings : It'd be really great if there was something really hard and really scary that you had to do, and you could somehow zoom to the part where you're done and you're fine.

  [jump-cut from them on the roof of a building to inside] 

  Cassie McBain : That worked great!

• Jack Wilde : Ladies, I have a bone to pick with you.

  Cassie McBain : Darn, I was hoping to have a boneless day.

• Cassie McBain : And you don't want to see me mad. Do you know why?

  Karg : Why?

  Cassie McBain : Because mad is bad. Repeat after me. 'Mad is bad.'

  Karg : 'Mad is bad'?

  Cassie McBain : Louder.

  Karg : Mad is bad.

  Cassie McBain : That's good.

  Karg : Mad is good?

  Cassie McBain : Of course not. It's bad.

  Karg : Mad is bad or mad is good?

  Cassie McBain : Mad is bad and that's what good.

  Karg : It's good that it's bad?

  Cassie McBain : And it's bad that it's good.

  Karg : Mad is bad, and bad is good, so that means that mad is good for being bad.

  Cassie McBain : And don't you forget it.

• Amy : Who the hell are you people?

  Shane Phillips : We're ex-cons working for a clandestine group to take down low-lifes likes you.

  Mica Divornak : That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

  Cassie McBain : Yeah, everyone always says that.

  Shane Phillips : Right before we kick their asses.

• Cassie McBain : I love a man who's mildly assertive. No, I don't. I always get those two confused.

• Cassie McBain : It looks like something Kandinsky threw up on. What? Dennis Miller's gone, somebody's got to make pretentious semi-obscure references.

• Cassie McBain : [preparing to houseclean]  It's 2100 hours. We all know our assignments. With a precise coordinated attack we should be able to complete our attack by 0300 hours. Ready? (sits down) Or we could just relax, watch 'Sex and the City', and hope the cleaning fairies show up tonight.

• D.D. Cummings : So we've gone from imprisoned hardened couch potatoes to freedom-loving couch potatoes?

  Cassie McBain : Yeah, but now we have the choice to be worthless and lazy.

• Cassie McBain : Sorry, it's just not one of those stories you enjoy retelling...

  [cut to flashback] 

  Cassie McBain : but I'll try.

  Shane Phillips : What's going on?

  Cassie McBain : It's a flashback. If we were on TV, there'd be those fuzzy little edges all around the picture.

  D.D. Cummings : Wow...

• Margo : If my father would have relaxed every now and then, maybe he wouldn't have put that gun in his mouth.

  Cassie McBain : Your father committed suicide?

  Margo : No, just put a gun in his mouth. Was going for a world record with a Winchester rifle - all he could manage was a Colt .45. I tell you, that man had cheeks like a Hefty Bag.

• Cassie McBain : And how many double agents can you have before everybody is just a double-agent, and nobody's just an agent-agent anymore?

  Shane Phillips : (thinks about it) Six.

  Cassie McBain : Really? I didn't know that.

  Shane Phillips : I'm pretty sure it's in the handbook.

• Cassie McBain : [hitting a bad guy with a sled named Rosebud]  I just Kaned a Citizen. I love action quips.

• Cassie McBain : Would've been better with ninjas.

  Shane Phillips : That's what we were saying.

  D.D. Cummings : You think so too?

  Cassie McBain : Absolutely, the noises they make and the way they always travel in groups. And how about how they let one finish fighting before the other jumps in

  Shane Phillips : Yeah, we forgot about that. They are so polite.

  D.D. Cummings : I like that about ninjas.

• Kelly Sawyer : I guess you've heard of cryogenics?

  Cassie McBain : Sure we have; the human snowcone, the freeze-dried nuts, the people who get frostbite *after* they die.

  D.D. Cummings : Walt Disney did it; who's next, Michael Ice-ner?

  Cassie McBain : The only people who've done that are absolute zeros.

  D.D. Cummings : Or people with bi-polar personalities.

  Kelly Sawyer : What were they in jail for, was it beating a joke to death?

• Cassie McBain : What a day, huh? Parachuting into a cemetary because the perimeter was guarded and it was our only way in, and exposing a deadly double agent who was trying to elude capture by faking his own death and being buried with an oxygen tank, only to be dug up later.

  D.D. Cummings : We knew all that, you know.

  Cassie McBain : I know. I'm just saying it for anyone who might've been wondering why we're going through all that trouble.

  Shane Phillips : Who'd be wondering?

  Cassie McBain : I don't know, anyone.

  [pauses and looks around] 

  Cassie McBain : Look, I've never told you guys this, it's kind of embarrassing. Sometimes I get the weirdest feeling like people are watching us, like they're listening in on every single thing we do or say.

  Shane Phillips : Yeah, I get that feeling, too.

  D.D. Cummings : So do I.

  [all 3 turn to look suspiciously into the camera] 

  Cassie McBain : Creepy, huh?

  D.D. Cummings : Yeah, very.

  Shane Phillips : My hair's a mess.

• Cassie McBain : Careful is my middle name.

  [to Shane] 

  Cassie McBain : Changed it from Lillian.

  Shane Phillips : Good thinking.