Orange County (2002)

Ben Stiller: The Firefighter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Firefighter : What's your name?

  Lance : Uh, Joe... John... uh, Joe-John.

  Firefighter : Your name's Joe-John?

  Lance : John-ston, Johnston. Joe.

  Firefighter : You wanna tell me what happened here?

  Lance : Uh, there was a fire, I dunno, I came by and it's... checkin out the fire.

  Firefighter : Well that lady uh, Mona? She said that you two were in the building together when the fire started.

  Lance : Yeah, she's a liar, cuz I dunno her so whatever, whatever she says is a lie, so...

  Firefighter : K, so you're saying you weren't in the building with that woman?

  Lance : No, not I! Aright, she started it, aright? Because she was like "I hate my job, I'm gonna burn this mother down!" And I said "You better not... you better not!"

  Firefighter : She said it was an electrical fire.

  Lance : It was. It was a total electrical fire, it was like uh, the switches had sparks comin out, and the sockets, and uh it was like the 4th of July, man!

  Firefighter : Why aren't you wearing your pants, Joe?

  Lance : I tripped, and uh then I had to take 'em off to run faster out of the flames...

  [coughing] 

  Lance : I think I inhaled some smoke, will you excuse me one second, I'll be right back.

  [runs away in the background] 

  Firefighter : [into walkie talkie]  We got a sprinter. Five foot five, no pants, unkempt... portly.