Dude, Where's My Car? (2000)
Andy Dick: Mark
Photos
Quotes
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Mark : I've been in this cage for 3 years and 5 months and 17 days, but who's countin'?
[laughs hysterically]
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[Pierre has a deep French ascent]
Pierre : But luckily for you, I am an onihgable man.
Mark : Excuse me, what was that?
Pierre : Onihgable!
Mark : What?... Oner gable?
Pierre : Onihgable!
Mark : Omini-hrm?
Pierre : Onihgable!
Mark : I still don't...
Pierre : [Irritated] Onihgable!
Mark : [Pronouncing it perfectly] I think the word you're looking for is "honorable".
Pierre : SHUT UP!
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Pierre : Alright, here it is: I am going to ask you a question. If you get it right, I will set you free. If you get it wrong, then, you will be spending a lot of time with the ever popular Mark.
Mark : I can be very nice.
[Mark begins to rub his nipples, while Jesse and Chester looks at him with disgust]
Pierre : Alright, here it is: What is the average running speed of a full-grown male African Ostrich?
Mark : [whispers] Pass. Pass to me, I know it.
Jesse : Pass to Mark.
Pierre : [screaming] You cannot pass! Shut up! What do I have to do to shut you up? Do I have to hose you down again?
Mark : Don't hose me! Maybe later.
Jesse : Dude, we're dead.
Chester : [whispers] Not so fast.
Chester : The full-grown male African Ostrich, or the latin "Struthio Camelus," can grow to an average size of six feet-six inches, and weigh anywhere from 225 to 350 pounds, that can get up to, oh, an average speed of 27 miles per hour.
Pierre : [showing excitement] This is absolutely correct!
Chester : Animal Planet.
Mark : Wow! I said Brown.
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Mark : Well someone sure is a Grumpy Gus today.