Novocaine (2001)

Steve Martin: Frank Sangster

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Quotes 

• Frank : [Pulling his own teeth to fake his death]  Strange as it may seem, it didn't hurt like I thought it would. In fact, with each tooth I pulled, I felt a little better... a little less trapped... a little more free. Until I felt so free that what I had to do didn't seem so bad at all.

• Frank : [Discovering he's been framed for his brother's murder]  Suddenly, there I was... seeing it all for the first time. Oh, she'd set me up, all right. Not just for Duane's murder. She'd gotten me for Harlan's too. My teeth marks were all over the body.

  Frank : [Trying to figure out what to do, he notices a bottle of Novocaine]  Then I saw the solution. It was right there in front of me. Frank Sangster had to die... and his whole, perfect world along with him.

• Frank : What do you say?

  Jean : I'm not going to fulfill your fantasies in the dentist chair!

  Frank : You never know. Might be fun.

  Jean : I promise tonight, in the bed.

• Frank : You were supposed to show up here at 7:30 in the morning.

  Susan : Ah, in the morning, I thought you meant 7:30 at night.

  Frank : I'm not giving you anymore prescriptions, so you can just leave.

  Susan : I came here to get my tooth fixed. Now are you going to do that, or not?

• Frank : A person can lose a lot of things. He can lose his soul. He can lose his life. But I've always said the worst thing a man can lose is his teeth. It's true, I should know.

• Frank : I trust people, but I'm no dummy. I knew she was scamming me, and I should have thrown her out right then but I didn't. You see, that's the nature of attraction. You find yourself doing things, and you have no idea why, but you do them anyway.

• Frank : What's the drift? You roll into town. You line up a few dentists or do you hit doctors too?

  Susan Ivey : Dentists are easier. They're dumber. No offense.

• Frank : They say home is the place where when you get there they can't turn you away. I guess for my brother Harlan, I was home. I'd never done anything wrong to him, but somehow I always felt I owed him something.

• Susan Ivey : Look at me. Take a good look. I can't even help myself. So, how can I help you?

  Frank : All you have to do is believe me.

• Lance Phelps : There's no way that you did it.

  Frank : Yeah, I didn't.

  Lance Phelps : Yeah, of course not. Because... it's way too obvious. The audience would never believe it.

  Frank : What audience?

  Lance Phelps : You know. You know. Like if this was a movie.

  Frank : This is not a movie, Lance. This is real life.

  Lance Phelps : I know that. But do they know that?

  Frank : Who?

  Lance Phelps : You know. The audience.

• Detective Lunt : Chopper, chopper.

  Frank : Why do you keep calling me that?

  Detective Lunt : Why do you think, body boy?

• Frank : Don't smoke in here. We have extremely flammable gas.

  Detective Lily Pons : Don't we all?

• Frank : The worst thing that could happen to a guy is to lose his teeth... that his unless he pulls them out himself.