Honey Wilder: Aunt Diane

Quotes 

• [after Marsha notices Diane's nephew sleeps on a couch with an erection, she convinces Diane to let her tuck it back into his pants so he wouldn't wake up embarrassed] 

  Marsha : [tries but then stops]  It's too stiff. Just let me slicken it up a little bit and then it would slide back in.

  [casually performs what is not unlike a fellatio] 

  Aunt Diane : [her eyes almost pop out]  Marsha, do you have any idea what you're doing?

  Marsha : Why, hell yes, I do it all the time!

  [not pretending anymore, Marsha goes for a deepthroat] 

• Marsha : Diane, you'd love that cock, you better try it.

  [pulls herself off of Jimmy] 

  Jimmy : Yeah, well come on, aunt Diane. I've always wanted to.

  Aunt Diane : You have?

  Marsha : Come on, Diane, try it.

  Aunt Diane : Oh well, might as well keep it in the family...

• [When her masseur massages her hand, Aunt Diane uses this to touch him inappropriately] 

  Cable TV commentator : Ah... please Diane... I'll do the massaging.

  Aunt Diane : Every muscle needs a massage, you should know that...

  Cable TV commentator : Hmm, oh well, maybe you're right.

• [Jimmy moans as his older neighbor Marsha deepthroats him in his sleep] 

  Aunt Diane : [bewildered by her friend Marsha's actions]  Shh, go back to sleep, Jimmy.

  Jimmy : What's going on, aunt Diane?

  Marsha : You're getting your cock sucked, kid!

  [goes back to it] 

  Aunt Diane : [in despair]  Oh, my god...

• Marsha : [with Jimmy semi-awake after she gave him a fellatio in his sleep]  Hmm, I'd like to sit on this.

  Aunt Diane : [whispering]  Marsha, no! He's my nephew!

  Marsha : Well, he's not *my* nephew! Besides, I think he's kind of cute.

  Aunt Diane : Don't do it, Jimmy.

  [ignoring her, Marsha takes off Jimmy's pants, and he lets her mount him] 

• [Diane's neighbor Marsha starts mounting Jimmy right in front of his shocked aunt] 

  Jimmy : It feels so good, aunt Diane!

  Aunt Diane : [finally giving up on stopping Marsha]  Oh, I know...

• Miss Lillian Foxworth : This might be tough, Diane - I think he's shrinking.

  Aunt Diane : You mean you think he's getting smaller?

  Miss Lillian Foxworth : No, dear - his personality. But don't worry about a thing - I'm sure I can snap him out of it.