Nurse Betty (2000)

Chris Rock: Wesley

Photos 

Quotes 

• Charlie : Where am I, Purgatory?

  Wesley : Worse, Texas!

• Charlie : How'd they describe her?

  Wesley : You know, blonde, thin, whatever.

  Charlie : Slow down: blonde, thin, yeah. Did they say anything about style? Did they mention grace?

• Charlie : People who get the calls are good. Not flashy, good. They get in, they get out, nobody knows a goddamn thing. You understand? Boom, boom, boom. Three in the head, you know they're dead.

  Wesley : You know, that's kind of catchy.

  Charlie : Yeah? Well I'll make you a fucking bumper sticker.

• Sherrif Eldon Ballard : I've got two kids and a dog.

  Wesley : Yeah, who don't?

  [punches him] 

• [Charlie is criticizing Wesley for scalping Betty's husband] 

  Wesley : Why the fuck did you mention all them Indians for?

  Charlie : Jesus Christ, Wesley! If I had mentioned Ty Cobb, would you have beat him to death with a baseball bat?

• Betty : [gesturing at Wesley's meat sandwich]  You sure you don't want a salad?

  Wesley : You sure you want a tip when I'm done?

• Wesley : Did you have a good time? Did you make a wish? Get in touch with your blackness? Found your Betty... well, at least where she has been hanging out.

  Charlie : Where? Where is she?

  Wesley : Not telling you.

  Charlie : What?

  Wesley : Not telling you till you straighten up. Danced around like fucking bo-jangles out there, what the fuck? This has got to stop, and I mean it!

• Wesley : I saw your TV movie. It sucked! Hasselhoff blew you off the screen!

• Wesley : I'll shoot that bitch like she scratched my car.

• Wesley : This stuff's nuttier than my shit after I've eaten an Almond Roca!

• [as George is leaving after talking with Charlie] 

  Wesley : Actually, there is one more thing. I kinda thought you'd be able to let me have a little talk with Jasmine.

  George McCord : Well you thought wrong.

  Wesley : [Grabs his arm]  Hey man! It's just an autograph, it's not for me.

  George McCord : Oh, it never is.

  [Wesley slaps him] 

  Wesley : You need to learn some fucking manners!

• Charlie : Now I'm gonna tell you what stupid is. Stupid is taking something that doesn't belong to you. Right Wesley?

  Wesley : That's right.

  Charlie : Stupid is trying to sell it to other people who are, by their very nature, untrustworthy.

  Wesley : That is so right.

  Charlie : Stupid is calling people in Kansas City who are affiliated with the rightful owners of the thing you stole, and trying to sell it to them. Right Wesley?

  Wesley : Now, that's really stupid.

  Charlie : So you see, we have totally different ideas of what's stupid and what's not. Don't we?

• Charlie : I'll tell you, if anyone got a raw deal it's the American Indian. This country has a black mark on its soul for what was done to them. I'm all for them owning casinos, getting rich off the white man's greed. It's a beautiful piece of irony, isn't it, Wesley?

  Wesley : It sure is!

• Charlie : Are you out of your fucking mind? What the hell is the matter with you?

  [Del struggles to escape after being scalped by Wesley as Charlie pulls out his gun and shoots him to death] 

  Charlie : What the fuck is your problem?

  Wesley : You told me to do it!

  Charlie : That was to get him to talk

• Charlie : So, give me an example of a stupid person doing a stupid thing. Not being stupid yourself, you're equipped to know. Right?

  Del : Are we gonna get down to business here or not?

  Charlie : Just give me one example.

  Del : One? OK, OK. Burger King opens up. These assholes get excited and line up like they've never seen one before. Like it's some kind of five-star restaurant.

  Charlie : Five stars?

  Del : Yeah.

  Charlie : How about it, Wesley? That sound stupid to you?

  Wesley : No, that's ignorant. They just don't know any better.

• Charlie : This is great, just great! Now we don't know where the goddamn stuff is.

  Wesley : He told us it's in the Buick.

  Charlie : We don't know which Buick, do we?

  Wesley : Well, why'd you shoot him?

  Charlie : I had to shoot him! It was the only decent thing to do AFTER YOU SCALPED HIM!

• Wesley : You gave me a look!

  Charlie : What look?

  Wesley : That one look you got! I thought you were done, so I offed him.

  Charlie : I wasn't done, I was just sick of hearing him whine. And you didn't off him, you scalped him. Christ, I almost puked, did I tell you that

• Del Sizemore : Can we get down to business, please?

  [Wesley pulls a gun out of his pocket and points it at Del's head] 

  Del Sizemore : [startled]  Jesus Christ!

  Wesley : He's waiting.

  Del Sizemore : OK, OK, OK!, I don't know, Injuns are stupid.

  Wesley : [shocked]  Injuns?

  Charlie : Del, did you just say "Injuns"?

  Del Sizemore : Indians. Injuns, whatever. I mean, they're always getting drunk and doin' stupid shit.

  Charlie : Like what?

  Del Sizemore : Pukin' on the sidewalk. Stupid shit.

  Charlie : Well, let's see, round here, that would be Kiowa, Kickapoo and Osage. Am I right about that?

  Del Sizemore : I... I don't know.

  Charlie : You don't know?