BASEketball (1998)

Yasmine Bleeth: Jenna Reed

Photos 

Quotes 

• Robert Stack : The police have pieced together numerous theories on Coop's whereabouts.

  Douglas "Swish" Reemer : I have no fucking clue where the hell he is. For all I care he could be hanging by his neck in his fucking closet!

  Robert Stack : Scenario One: He's hanging by his neck in his fucking closet.

  Jenna Reed : You want to know where Coop is? Just look for the most heinous, vile, and horrible exploitation of children on the planet.

  Robert Stack : Scenario Two: Coop went to Disney World.

  [Stack makes a look like even he can't believe how dumb that joke was] 

• Jenna Reed : I've been the director of the Dream Come True foundations since October.

  Joseph R. Cooper : The ones that grant wishes to sick a dying kids, right?

  Jenna Reed : Oh, well we like to think of them as health challenged and survival impaired.

• Coop : Ya know sometimes I forget why I play the game. I do it because of Mr. October.

  Jenna Reed : You mean the guy from the Chippendales Calendar?

  Coop : No that was Dwayne Zachemore...

  [Coop looks surprised] 

  Coop : I mean who ever it was...

• Jenna Reed : Joey, look who's here!

  Joey Thomas : My biological father?

• Joey Thomas : I've always dreamed of big game hunting. How about killing an endangered species? Like a bald eagle or a giant panda!

  Jenna Reed : Well Joey I don't think that's really in the true spirit of the foundation.

  Joey Thomas : Well then how about poisoning a reservoir? I know! How about throwing flesh-eating fish into a public swimming pool?

  Douglas "Swish" Reemer : I don't think you're quite getting the point, dude.

• Douglas "Swish" Reemer : Hey kid, think fast!

  [He throws the ball, knocking the kid out cold] 

  Douglas "Swish" Reemer : He's a little slow on the hands.

  Jenna Reed : He's blind, Doug.

• Joe Cooper : Goddamn it, Remer! I told you this was going to happen, didn't I?

  Doug Remer : Hey, If you would have agreed to Cain's changes in the first place, it never have got this far!

  Joe Cooper : Dude, because of you! Jenna's foundation is totally screwed!

  Doug Remer : Me? I was the one trying to...

  Jenna Reed : Oh, there you are!

  Joe Cooper : Jenna!

  Jenna Reed : [comes to Coop and Remer]  I saw the pictures!

  [slams the pictures down] 

  Jenna Reed : This is awful! It's gonna mean the end of the foundation, you know it's not endowed like... Well, like.

  Joe Cooper : Jenna, I can explain.

  Doug Remer : Yes. It was his fault.

  Joe Cooper : [to Remer]  Me? This is your mess, Remer! I should have kept the team to myself!

  Doug Remer : Dude, I just don't know you anymore!

  Jenna Reed : Enough! Look at yourselves. You're just typical man with humongous... egos! You're like every pro athlete, I should have kept the kids away from you. Now, their little lives are ruined and all you can do is argue about who's the bigger penis! I mean, child... Long wanger, Oh! Throbbing cock, Ohhh! God, I don't even know what I mean anymore!

  Joe Cooper : Jenna, wait!

  [she leaves them] 

  Doug Remer : You got to believe us, Jenna! It was all Coop's fault!

  [she slams the door] 

• Jenna Reed : Excuse me, driver? Can you go any faster?

  Dale Earnhardt : [looks back]  Can I go any faster?

  [puts on his trademark black Goodwrench race helmet and accelerates the taxi] 

  Dale Earnhardt : HANG ON!

• Douglas "Swish" Reemer : Here's your decaf mocha Jenna, just like you take it, low fat milk, non-fat whipped cream, a little sprinkle of cinnamon.

  Jenna Reed : Thank you Doug.

  Douglas "Swish" Reemer : And I baked you fresh poppy-seed muffins too.

• Jenna Reed : What Joey really needs to know, is where are you going to be next year?

  Joseph R. Cooper : Right here, and the next year, and the year after that, right up until Joey grows up... and gets a driver's license, and starts going out with girls... meets the right one, forgets about baseketball altogether.

  [They kiss, then move apart] 

  Joseph R. Cooper : Goes home, does some pushups, fucks the sleeve of his favourite jacket...

  Jenna Reed : What?

  Joseph R. Cooper : Huh?

• Joseph R. Cooper : With that new liver he'll be peeing like a champ in no time!

  Jenna Reed : That's kidneys, Coop.