SAN FRANCISCO WHIZ BANGERS refers to a local drink (Left Coast analogy to Long Island Lemonade) that softens up two vacationing schoolteachers out for a night on the town. Something Weird reissued this long-forgotten grinder on Vol. 124 of its Dragon Art Theatre series.
The two plain Janes pay a mere $19.95 for a weekend "Night Club Tour" including a stay at the seedy Golden Gate Hotel. A creep named Mr. Wally (who's dressed as if auditioning for a role opposite Edward James Olmos in the period film ZOOT SUIT) takes them to a couple of bars, the second of which features live sex shows on stage.
As the girls get drunk Big George (well-cast Tyler Reynolds, only recognizable actor in the movie) gets a hand-job, blow job and then humps a tiny girl on stage. This turns on the more adventurous of the two teachers, Margaret, but literally shocks prudish Constance.
Mr. Wally pushes Constance up on stage for the followup audience participation segment, and Reynolds introduces her to the fine art of cunnilingus. This being porn, of course Constance loves it, while Margaret at her table is giving Wally a blow job, followed by an awkward attempt to ride him (this non-pro actor has trouble maintaining an erection).
The emcee next invites another amateur up on stage, a mousy, bespectacled young woman who definitely doesn't look like a porn actress. She's played by Kandi Johnson. She continues the cunnilingus on Constance, who later reciprocates.
Backstage, Kandi asks the emcee if she can come back another night and perform again, so he auditions her, and her XXX bonafides are fully established for the viewer. Even so, Kandi still looks like exactly what the part called for -an amateur from the audience, and not someone in the Rolodex of Pretty Models Agency.
Attempted kinkiness falls short, as Kandi tries twice to demonstrate "toe-humping", first with Constance and later the emcee, but it consists of merely softcore rubbing of foot against her private parts. She also repeatedly refers to the emcee as "sir", an odd but effective kind of domination/submission motif.
The gals wake up next day with a hangover and are planning their next $19.95 trip for summer vacation, with the calendar handily turned to June 1973 with "End of School" date circled to give an idea when this baby was shot.
A real cheapie, film's effectiveness emanates from the use of 1-shot, believably amateur talent. I prefer the superstar opuses of the early '70s, when the biggest names worked for a pittance, but unlike "Elvira Simpson" and "Sylvia Conners" the presence of Suzanne Fields or Rene Bond in the lead roles would have destroyed all credibility, given their over-familiarity.
The two plain Janes pay a mere $19.95 for a weekend "Night Club Tour" including a stay at the seedy Golden Gate Hotel. A creep named Mr. Wally (who's dressed as if auditioning for a role opposite Edward James Olmos in the period film ZOOT SUIT) takes them to a couple of bars, the second of which features live sex shows on stage.
As the girls get drunk Big George (well-cast Tyler Reynolds, only recognizable actor in the movie) gets a hand-job, blow job and then humps a tiny girl on stage. This turns on the more adventurous of the two teachers, Margaret, but literally shocks prudish Constance.
Mr. Wally pushes Constance up on stage for the followup audience participation segment, and Reynolds introduces her to the fine art of cunnilingus. This being porn, of course Constance loves it, while Margaret at her table is giving Wally a blow job, followed by an awkward attempt to ride him (this non-pro actor has trouble maintaining an erection).
The emcee next invites another amateur up on stage, a mousy, bespectacled young woman who definitely doesn't look like a porn actress. She's played by Kandi Johnson. She continues the cunnilingus on Constance, who later reciprocates.
Backstage, Kandi asks the emcee if she can come back another night and perform again, so he auditions her, and her XXX bonafides are fully established for the viewer. Even so, Kandi still looks like exactly what the part called for -an amateur from the audience, and not someone in the Rolodex of Pretty Models Agency.
Attempted kinkiness falls short, as Kandi tries twice to demonstrate "toe-humping", first with Constance and later the emcee, but it consists of merely softcore rubbing of foot against her private parts. She also repeatedly refers to the emcee as "sir", an odd but effective kind of domination/submission motif.
The gals wake up next day with a hangover and are planning their next $19.95 trip for summer vacation, with the calendar handily turned to June 1973 with "End of School" date circled to give an idea when this baby was shot.
A real cheapie, film's effectiveness emanates from the use of 1-shot, believably amateur talent. I prefer the superstar opuses of the early '70s, when the biggest names worked for a pittance, but unlike "Elvira Simpson" and "Sylvia Conners" the presence of Suzanne Fields or Rene Bond in the lead roles would have destroyed all credibility, given their over-familiarity.