Torrente, the Dumb Arm of the Law (1998)

Santiago Segura: Torrente

Quotes 

• Torrente : And I don't hit you because I know you like it!

• [subtitled version] 

  Torrente : [after drinking more than 8 glasses of whisky]  Got the time?

  Barman : Midnight. One more?

  Torrente : No. I've just started my shift.

• [subtitled version] 

  [in a car, during a surveillance operation] 

  Torrente : This is the worst part. Waiting for things to happen. Wanna jerk off?

  Rafi : [baffled]  What?

  Torrente : Jerk each other off.

  Rafi : You and me?

  Torrente : Of course!

  Rafi : Now?

  Torrente : For fun. You stroke me and I stroke you. Just to relax, no queer shit. Nothing queer.

• [subtitled version] 

  [first lines] 

  Torrente : Luisito!

  Barman : Torrente! What's it gonna be?

  Torrente : The usual.

• [subtitled version] 

  Torrente : [to Rafi, after snorting some cocaine]  Want some?

  Rafi : Drugs, right?

  Torrente : Damn right.

  Rafi : But it's bad.

  Torrente : What's bad about it? Here's a drug. Does it bite? Scratch? Grab your balls? What's so bad?

• [subtitled version] 

  Torrente : [about washing hands in a bathroom]  After? Look, kid. Some men washem before they piss. Some wash after. I wash before. Why? My cock is sacred. It should be worshipped. It's the earth core, the hosepipe to happiness. Do the same.

• [subtitled version] 

  [last lines] 

  Torrente : Let's go guys! To Torremolinos! Torrente's paying!