Spin City (1996–2002)

Michael Boatman: Carter Heywood, Carter Haywood

Photos 

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Quotes 

• James : Each year my mom makes a candy Nativity scene.

  [Carter walks by] 

  James : Chocolate Jesus.

  Carter : James, at work, just call me Carter.

• [Carter tires of giving dating advice] 

  James : Nikki asked me to get her a drink. What should I bring her?

  Carter : I don't know... a drink?

  James : She said to surprise her.

  Carter : Serve it to her naked.

• Stacey : Carter, act like my boyfriend.

  Carter : Sorry, I don't have time to buy a Camaro and alienate your parents.

• [a woman is making a pass at Carter] 

  Carter : Your heterosexual powers have no effect on me.

• Paul : You know, I've been allergic to cats all my life, but at the pet morgue, nothing. Turns out I'm not allergic to dead cats.

  Carter : Then you should definitely get one.

• Carter : If the Deputy Mayor speaks in his office, and there are no cameras to hear, does he make a sound?

• Stuart : If that woman ever shows her face again, I will unleash a punishment upon her she cannot even fathom.

  Carter : What are you gonna do? You gonna date her?

• [Paul has just got kicked out by his mother] 

  Carter : Oh, to be cast out to the world at the tender age of 40.

• Mike : Can you believe this guy?

  Carter : No. He has absolutely crossed the line. Who are we talking about?

• Janelle Cooper : [after beating Stewart in Air Hockey]  Stewart, here's the fax you've been waiting for. And a message from Roberta in payroll. Oh, and I almost forgot. I also have your pride, self-respect, and what's left of your manhood.

  Carter : You should get that back. Might need that someday.