Mr. Nanny (1993)
Sherman Hemsley: Burt Wilson
Photos
Quotes
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Thanatos : First you defy me? Then you mock my hair? You're dead!
[pulls out a gun]
Burt Wilson : Look out!
[covers Sean, gets shot, Thanatos finds the gun empty and runs away]
Burt Wilson : Get him!
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Burt Wilson : Give me 20 bucks for the cabbie, quick.
Sean Armstrong : Keep the change.
Cabbie : [sarcastically] Gee! A whole quarter.
Burt Wilson : A quarter? Gimme that! This ain't Christmas!
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Sean Armstrong : Show some respect, Burt saved my life.
Burt Wilson : Oh yeah, I took a bullet for this guy, nicked an artery, you should've seen the blood pumping out, ka-bloom, ka-bloom, ka-bloom - nearly hit the ceiling.
Kate Mason : Eeeew!
Alex Mason, Jr. : Cool!
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Thanatos : I ordered you to throw that match, cost me money, big money!
Burt Wilson : Oh yeah? Bigger than your hair?
Sean Armstrong : We don't throw matches.
Burt Wilson : Yeah, tell ya what, if you was soaked in some gasoline, we'd throw some matches, y'know the flaming kind, and with that fur-ball on top of your head, you'd make one hell of a torch.
[laughs]
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Sean Armstrong : Must've hit him pretty hard, he landed head first in the swimming pool of the hotel next door.
Alex Mason, Jr. : Must've made a killer splash!
Sean Armstrong : Na, the pool was empty, it would've killed him, but his hair cushioned the fall.
Burt Wilson : Of course they couldn't scrape up all of his brain goo but he got a nice metal plate in the slammer.
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Burt Wilson : You know I'm going to need a partner here.
Sean Armstrong : Thanks but you know I haven't had a vacation since... since I met you.
Burt Wilson : Vacation? Well you know if you need me I can get out of this monkey suit at any time.
Corinne : And how far do you think you're going to get on TWO broken legs?
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Burt Wilson : [when Sean wants to quit] Do me one last favor.
Sean Armstrong : What's that?
Burt Wilson : Go by my house and turn off the gas in my oven.
Sean Armstrong : Why can't you turn it off?
Burt Wilson : BECAUSE MY HEAD'S GONNA BE IN IT!
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Burt Wilson : [on the phone, while his stuff is being repossessed] I can't believe I'm talking to the same Sean Armstrong that I traveled all over this great country with. A man of strength and courage, who defeated every vile, vulgar opponent he ever faced. And now, this fearless giant is cowering because of two little innocent children!
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Sean Armstrong : [playing ballerinas with Kate] Burt, lovely to see you. You look positively effervescent. May I offer you tea? Perhaps a watercress sandwich?
Burt Wilson : Knock it off! And get outta that thing!
Sean Armstrong : Oh! You mean my leotard? Ah, the ballet. It enhances grace. I'm a changed man.
[Sean picks Burt up]
Burt Wilson : Aah! Hey! Put me down, you klutz!
Sean Armstrong : I'm not a klutz anymore, Burtinsky.
[trips over rolled-up rug]
Sean Armstrong : Oh!
[crashes into potted plants]
Kate Mason : He's not as far along as I thought.
Sean Armstrong : Darn, I jet'ed when I should've pli'ed.
Burt Wilson : And I used to share a hotel room with you?
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Corinne : [Burt's knocking on the door] Coming, I'm coming.
[Knocking continues]
Corinne : I said I'm coming!
[Swings the door open]
Burt Wilson : Mama!
Corinne : How would you like that cane up your nose?