Rock 'n' Roll High School (1979)

Vincent Van Patten: Tom Roberts

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tom Roberts : The only thing I'll ever lay is a rug!

• Tom Roberts : [needs to see Eaglebauer]  Miss, you don't understand. See, uh, this is an emergency.

  Norma : Animal, vegetable, or mineral?

  Tom Roberts : Um... sexual.

• Tom Roberts : I hear it's raining cats and dogs in Idaho

• Tom Roberts : I got to get myself together. I need to improve my self image. I need to broaden my horizons! Riff Randell. I need to get laid.

• Eaglebauer : Tell me - exactly what you want out of life.

  Tom Roberts : I want someone with huge breasts.

  Eaglebauer : The sweet, stirring, passionate youth.

  Tom Roberts : I want to get laid before I'm 30.

  Eaglebauer : Are you a virgin?

  Tom Roberts : Do you mean - technically?

  Eaglebauer : You've come to the right place.

• Tom Roberts : Couldn't I just practice with myself?

  Eaglebauer : You've done too much of that already.

• Tom Roberts : Look at all this stuff! Tele-TV, stereo, wet bar, water bed! Say, I never knew gettin' laid was so expensive.

• Eaglebauer : You can move right in. She'll be a pushover. And, besides, look how far you've come in three days.

  Tom Roberts : Yeah, but the question is, how far will she go tonight?

• Tom Roberts : The only thing I'll ever lay is a carpet.