Kramer vs. Kramer (1979)
Justin Henry: Billy Kramer
Photos
Quotes
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Billy Kramer : Daddy?
Ted Kramer : Yeah?
Billy Kramer : I'm sorry.
Ted Kramer : I'm sorry too. I want you to go to sleep because it's really late.
Billy Kramer : Daddy?
Ted Kramer : Now what is it?
Billy Kramer : Are you going away?
Ted Kramer : No. I'm staying here with you. You can't get rid of me that easy.
Billy Kramer : That's why Mommy left, isn't it? Because I was bad?
Ted Kramer : Is that what you think? No. That's not it, Billy. Your mom loves you very much... and the reason she left has nothing to do with you. I don't know if this will make sense, but I'll try to explain it to you. I think the reason why Mommy left... was because for a long time... I kept trying to make her be a certain kind of person. A certain kind of wife that I thought she was supposed to be. And she just wasn't like that. She was... She just wasn't like that. I think that she tried for so long to make me happy... and when she couldn't, she tried to talk to me about it. But I wasn't listening. I was too busy, too wrapped up... just thinking about myself. And I thought that anytime I was happy, she was happy. But I think underneath she was very sad. Mommy stayed here longer than she wanted because she loves you so much. And the reason why Mommy couldn't stay anymore... was because she couldn't stand me. She didn't leave because of you. She left because of me. Go to sleep now because it's really late, okay? Good night. Sleep tight.
Billy Kramer : Don't let the bedbugs bite.
Ted Kramer : See you in the morning light.
Billy Kramer : Daddy?
Ted Kramer : Yeah?
Billy Kramer : I love you.
Ted Kramer : I love you too.
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Ted Kramer : [while Billy brings ice cream to the table] You go right back and put that right back until you finish your dinner... I'm warning you, you take one bite out of that and you are in big trouble. Don't... Hey! Don't you dare... Don't you DARE do that. You hear me? Hold it right there! You put that ice cream in your mouth and you are in very, very, VERY big trouble. Don't you dare go anywhere beyond that... Put it down right now. I am not going to say it again. I am NOT going to say it AGAIN.
[Billy eats ice cream]
Billy Kramer : [Ted picks him up] Ow! You're hurting me!
Ted Kramer : OW! Don't you kick me!
Billy Kramer : I hate you!
Ted Kramer : You're no bargain either, pal! You are a spoiled, rotten little brat and I'll tell you right now...
Billy Kramer : I hate you!
Ted Kramer : And I hate you back, you little shit!
Billy Kramer : I want my mommy!
Ted Kramer : I'm all you got.
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[Phyllis comes out of the bedroom, naked, sees Billy and screams]
Billy Kramer : Hi.
Phyllis Bernard : Hi.
Billy Kramer : What's your name?
Phyllis Bernard : I'm Phyllis Bernard.
Billy Kramer : Who?
Phyllis Bernard : I'm a friend... uh, business associate of your father's... dad.
Ted Kramer : [in the bedroom] Oh, Jesus.
Billy Kramer : Do you like fried chicken?
Phyllis Bernard : Fried chicken? Very much.
Billy Kramer : So do I.
Phyllis Bernard : Uhm... well, it's really... It's been nice seeing you and...
Billy Kramer : Bye.
Phyllis Bernard : Bye.
[comes back to the bedroom]
Phyllis Bernard : Kramer, I just met your son.
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Ted Kramer : What's the matter?
Billy Kramer : Your hand's all sweaty! When's Mommy coming back?
Ted Kramer : Soon. I told you before. Very soon.
Billy Kramer : Is she gonna pick me up after school?
Ted Kramer : Probably. And if she doesn't I will.
Billy Kramer : What if you forget?
Ted Kramer : I won't forget!
Billy Kramer : What if you get run over by a truck and get killed? Then what happens?
Ted Kramer : Then Mommy will pick you up.
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Billy Kramer : Who's gonna read me my bedtime stories?
Ted Kramer : Mommy will.
Billy Kramer : You're not gonna kiss me good night anymore, are you, Dad?
Ted Kramer : No, I won't be able to do that. But, you know, I get to visit. It's gonna be ok, really.
Billy Kramer : [crying] If I don't like it, can I come home?
Ted Kramer : What do you mean if you don't like it? You're gonna have a great time with Mommy. Really. She loves you so much.
Billy Kramer : Dad? Don't forget, once, if you can just call me up, okay?
Ted Kramer : We're gonna be okay. Come on, let's go get some ice cream.
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Billy Kramer : We need cereal.
Ted Kramer : Okay, what color?
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[Ted and Billy are having dinner]
Ted Kramer : How was school today?
Billy Kramer : Same as usual.
Ted Kramer : Hey, I see the Knicks finally won a game, what do you know?
Billy Kramer : I don't care.
Ted Kramer : What do you mean?
Billy Kramer : I like Boston.
Ted Kramer : Boston? Why do you like Boston?
Billy Kramer : 'Cause Mommy's from Boston.
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Ted Kramer : So, did you have a lot of fun?
Billy Kramer : You're late.
Ted Kramer : I'm not that late - I'm only 20 minutes.
Billy Kramer : Wanna make a bet?
Ted Kramer : Yeah.
Billy Kramer : All the other mothers were there before you!
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Billy Kramer : What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence.
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Billy Kramer : What did you do when you were little?
Ted Kramer : I guess about the same things you do.
Billy Kramer : Did you watch "The Brady Bunch"?
Ted Kramer : No. We didn't have any television.
Billy Kramer : You didn't?
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Billy Kramer : What else didn't you have when you were little?
Ted Kramer : We didn't have lots of things.
Billy Kramer : Like?
Ted Kramer : Like a lot of things.
Billy Kramer : What kind?
Ted Kramer : Come here. We didn't have diet soda. We had egg creams - which is a little bit of chocolate syrup and a little bit of seltzer water and a little bit of milk and you went Shoooosh! all swooshed up when you drank it and it was de-licious. We didn't have the Mets, but, we had the Brooklyn Dodgers. We had the Polo Grounds. We had Ebbits Field. Ah, boy, those were the days. And we didn't have the Volkswagens; but, we had all those different kind of cars with the funny names on 'em. We didn't have any Burger Kings or McDonalds. We had automats where you went inside and you put a quarter in and you get, you know, a piece of pie or a sandwich that you see through a window. We didn't have any graffiti; but, we had this guy, Kilroy, and he went down the street...
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Billy Kramer : What is this crap?
Ted Kramer : Salisbury steak.
Billy Kramer : I hate it!
Ted Kramer : You do not hate it. You had it last week and you loved it.
Billy Kramer : No I didn't. I hate the brown stuff. It's gross.
Ted Kramer : All that is is onions and gravy.
Billy Kramer : I'm allergic to onions!
Ted Kramer : You are not allergic to onions. You had this last week and, remember, I told you it was my favorite when I was a little boy and you said it's my favorite too.
Billy Kramer : I did not.
Ted Kramer : Yes, you did. Here, it's regular hamburger. Just give it a little bite. It's delicious!
Billy Kramer : Yeech!
Ted Kramer : What's the matter?
Billy Kramer : I think I'm gonna throw up. It's yucky!
Ted Kramer : It's not yucky, Billy. Eat it!
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Ted Kramer : What grade are you in?
Billy Kramer : First.
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Billy Kramer : You're not going to kiss me good night any more, are you Dad?
Ted Kramer : No. I won't be able to do that. But, you know, I'll - I get to visit. It's gonna be okay. Really.
