- ["Big" Dick is points his pistol at Madame Desiree]
- Madame Desiree: That doesn't scare me. I've seen bigger ones in my time.
- Dick Turpin: That doesn't surprise me.
- Reverend Flasher: William, don't you think it's time you came to church again?
- William: What do you mean, Rector? Don't you remember? I was there last Sunday. I took the collection.
- Reverend Flasher: I know. Next Sunday I want you to bring it back.
- [Madame Desiree passes him on the stairs carrying a sword]
- Capt. Desmond Fancey: I wouldn't fancy a poke with that.
- Madame Desiree: What did you say?
- Capt. Desmond Fancey: Your blade, ma'am. You handle it far too well for my liking!
- Madame Desiree: I shouldn't worry
- [pointing the blade at his crotch]
- Madame Desiree: You don't look as if you've got much to lose.
- Reverend Flasher: Ah, I see. Well, I'd like to use my organ again.
- Capt. Desmond Fancey: I beg your pardon?
- Reverend Flasher: The bellows are leaking and they do cost so much to repair them.
- Reverend Flasher: [while doing a sermon Flasher says that anyone who has not visited a prostitute may leave the church. Bodkin gets up and starts to leave] Ah... Brother Bodkin. I see you haven't sinned
- Bodkin: No Reverend... I just remembered where I left my hat last night!
- Reverend Flasher: Ha ha ha ha!
- Reverend Flasher: If there is one man, just one man amongst you who can say in all truthfulness that within the past week he has not committed adultery then he may leave this church now and go with my blessing.
- [Bodkin stands up and starts to leave]
- Reverend Flasher: Ah, we have at least one good man with us. Well done, brother Bodkin.
- Bodkin: Oh it's not that, Rector. You just reminded me where I left my hat last night.
- Harriet: [ringing the church bells as Reverend Flasher watches intently - suddenly her bodice comes unfastened, exposing her breasts. She covers herself] Oooo, Rector! Sorry!
- Reverend Flasher: Don't apologise. Tom, you'd better pump the organ today.
- [to Harriet]
- Reverend Flasher: Have we got enough out there for a good collection?
- Harriet: I'll just pop out and see.
- Reverend Flasher: You 'pop out' any more and we'll have standing room only!
- [they both laugh]
- Capt. Desmond Fancey: [On arrival at the 10 o'clock rendezvous, as directed by Harriet:] "That's not a Blasted Oak: it's a Bloody Yew"
- Narrator: Richard Turpin. More commonly referred to as Big Dick, owing to the unusual size of his weapon.
- Narrator: In the year 1750, England was going through a period of lawlessness unprecedented in her history. Highwaymen terrorised the roads. Footpads and cutthroats were rioting the towns. It hasn't changed much, has it?