There's a Girl in My Soup (1970)

Tony Britton: Andrew

Quotes 

• Jimmy : Are you him?

  Andrew : Well, I'm certainly not her.

• John, the porter : He is back, sir, but, he's got company.

  Andrew : At 6:30 at the middle of rush hour?

  John, the porter : I think he's workin' them in shifts now, sir. I don't know sir, but, they go in and out of there like a woman's relay race.

  Andrew : He must be very - fit.

  John, the porter : You should see this one sir. Oh, the legs on her - right up to her bum. Not like my Misses. Her ass comes down to meet her knees.

• Andrew : Who is this?

  Robert Danvers : Can't you look at a girl without lathering up?

• Andrew : You treat your sex life like a continuous wine tasting. Roll 'em 'round and spit 'em out.

• Andrew : Well, I must offer you my heartiest congratulations, old boy. She is a doll!

• Andrew : It's rather like picking one's nose in public when one has a perfectly adequate handkerchief in one's pocket.

• Andrew : Good morning!

  Marion : Well, can I help you?

  Andrew : Is himself in?

  Marion : He's in the shower.

• Andrew : What's happened to your other girlfriend?

  Jimmy : Oh, her. I booted her ass out of it.

  Andrew : Did you, really? You sweet old fashioned thing.

  Jimmy : Where is she then?

  Andrew : Who knows? Rubbing her ass, presumably. - - Oh, you mean Marion.