The Italian Job (1969)

Michael Caine: Charlie Croker

Photos 

44 more photos

Quotes 

• [Arthur blows up a truck] 

  Charlie Croker : You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!

• [last lines] 

  Charlie Croker : Hang on a minute lads, I've got a great idea.

• Charlie Croker : Just remember this - in this country they drive on the wrong side of the road.

• Garage Manager : You must have shot an awful lot of tigers, sir.

  Charlie Croker : Yes, I used a machine gun.

• Charlie Croker : It's a very difficult job and the only way to get through it is we all work together as a team. And that means you do everything I say.

• Charlie Croker : You'll be making a grave error if you kill us. There are a quarter of a million Italians in Britain and they'll be made to suffer. Every restaurant, cafe, ice-cream parlor, gambling den and nightclub in London, Liverpool and Glasgow - will be smashed. Mr. Bridger will drive them into the sea.

• [Lorna picks Charlie up from prison] 

  Charlie Croker : This car belongs to the Pakistani ambassador!

  Lorna : It does?

  Charlie Croker : Typical, isn't it? I've been out of jail five minutes, and already I'm in a hot car.

  Lorna : Charlie, I just wanted you to come out in style, baby.

• Charlie Croker : What's the matter.

  Yellow : He says he wants to sit up in front with the driver!

  Coco : I always get sick in the back.

  Yellow : Listen, if I go in the back, I'll get me migraine, I'll be out like a light.

  Charlie Croker : You are not going to be sick. You are not going to have your migraine. And everybody is gonna sit in the back of the motor!

  Arthur : Charlie, me in the back of the motor with my asthma?

• Charlie Croker : You wouldn't hit a man with no trousers on, would you?

• Dominic : Shouldn't we synchronise our watches?

  Charlie Croker : Nuts to your watches! You just be at the Piazza at a quarter to...

• Charlie Croker : Wait till you see them Italian birds.

  Professor Simon Peach : Are they big? I like them big.

  'Camp' Freddie : They're enormous.

  Professor Simon Peach : Really?

  'Camp' Freddie : Very, very, very big.

• Lorna : [after hearing a rapid knock at the door]  It's the Law, Charlie!

  Charlie Croker : What you tell 'em?

  Lorna : Charlie, would I tell them anything?

  Charlie Croker : ...Yes you would.

• Charlie Croker : Bill?

  Bill Bailey : Yes, Charlie?

  Charlie Croker : Bill!

  Bill Bailey : Yes, Charlie?

  Charlie Croker : Burn this for me, will 'ya?

  Bill Bailey : Yes, Charlie.

  Charlie Croker : Oh, Bill?

  Bill Bailey : Yes, Charlie?

  Charlie Croker : Get rid of this, lot.

  Bill Bailey : Yes, Charlie.

• Tailor : Very elegant, sir; though I do believe you've gained a little weight.

  Charlie Croker : Yes, well, uh, I've been in America, you see. It's the, uh, bread in the hamburger.

  Tailor : Is that so?

  Charlie Croker : Yes.

  Tailor : Well, I'm glad you're out - I mean back.

• Miss Peach : Yes, well, not to put a too fine point to it, he was discovered - in the lounge.

  Charlie Croker : Eh, doing what, Miss Peach?

  Miss Peach : Where?

  Charlie Croker : In the, eh, lounge.

  Miss Peach : Oh, yes, he was doing it. Yes.

  Charlie Croker : What?

  Miss Peach : Oh. Well, something quite obscene. With Annette.

  Charlie Croker : [puzzled]  A net?

  Miss Peach : Annette. She was terrified, of course.

  Charlie Croker : Naturally.

• Charlie Croker : And do us a favor, Adrian. Shorten the sleeves, will you, love? I'm not a gorilla.

• Lorna : Now, what would you like?

  Charlie Croker : Everything.

• Charlie Croker : Why didn't you come and see me when I was inside, then?

  Lorna : Charlie, you know that's not my scene. I mean, can you see me sitting there holding your hands across the table, with those weeping wives around with their howling kids - and then the guards lookin' at me as if I've got something hidden up my dress.

• Charlie Croker : Take me to my tailor.

• [first lines] 

  Charlie Croker : Cheerio, lads!

• Charlie Croker : I haven't been in this car for so long.

  Garage Manager : Yes, I gather you've been in India for about two years, sir.

  Charlie Croker : Yes, shooting tigers.

  Garage Manager : Oh, really? That's splendid.

• Charlie Croker : Freddie, this job is big.

  'Camp' Freddie : Charlie, you wouldn't even know how to spell big.

  Charlie Croker : B-l-G. Big.

• Charlie Croker : Mr Bridger, this is important. Four million dollars. Europe. The Common Market. Italy. The FIAT car factory.

• Charlie Croker : I can always take it to the Americans. They're people who - recognize young talent, give it a chance, they are.

• Charlie Croker : Professor Peach, do you see what I'm getting at?

  Professor Simon Peach : Your brawn, my brain. I'm not stupid, you know.

• Professor Simon Peach : Would we, eh, wear stockings over our heads?

  Charlie Croker : Oh, no need for you to.

  Professor Simon Peach : Oh. I'd like that. I could steal one of Matron's, couldn't I?

• Charlie Croker : You can't be too careful. Is there a toilet here?

  Bill Bailey : If you can call it that. It's out the back.

  Charlie Croker : Yeah, well, wash the handle and the seat. I don't want any prints on that, either.

• Charlie Croker : We're balancing right on the edge.