The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)

Myrtle Vail: Winifred Krelborn

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Quotes 

• [last lines] 

  Winifred : SEYMOUR?

  Seymour : I didn't mean it!

• Winifred : [reading a medicine botte label]  If you get hit by a truck, call your physician.

• Seymour : Look, Ma, I've gotta go. Can I bring you anything?

  Winifred : Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bring me the Evening News. They're running a self-diagnosis contest The winner gets to go the Mayo Clinic.

• Winifred : She's out after your money.

  Seymour : I don't have any money.

  Winifred : Oh, she's a smart one. She'll latch onto ya until you get some, and then goodbye fortune.

• Seymour : But Audrey's an honest girl, ma.

  Winifred : Ya never trust a woman who's too healthy.

• Winifred : Did you stop at Dr. Mallard's and get the results of my tests?

  Seymour : Yeah. He said there's nothing wrong with ya.

  Winifred : Ah, not Dr. Mallard! He... He's one doctor I thought would tell the truth.

  Seymour : He said you should be playing fullback for the Rams.

  Winifred : He wants me dead! I'll bet he's Assistant Coroner.

• Winifred : Here you are. Now try.

  Audrey : Sure smells different.

  Winifred : It's different.

  Audrey : Some kind of oil, isn't it?

  Winifred : Cod liver oil. Wonderful for the colon.

  Seymour : And that's sulphur powder on top.

• Winifred : I don't like my house cluttered up with rotten vegetables.

• Winifred : You thinkin' to get married?

  Audrey : He hasn't asked me yet.

  Winifred : Who hasn't?

  Audrey : Seymour.

  Winifred : Seymour's too young to get married. Look here. A boy's got to go and play around a little bit. Go out on the makin'. Have a ball.

  Seymour : Gee, Ma. I don't wanna have a ball. I wanna be with Audrey.

• Winifred : Don't look at me. I - I'm a terrible sight. I - I'm a complete sea hag.

• Winifred : Don't feel sorry for me. I'll just find a nice, wet alley somewhere and curl up and wait for the end.

• Winifred : You promised you wouldn't get married until you bought me an iron lung.

  Seymour : You've been breathing for years, Ma.

  Winifred : Well, it ain't easy. It ain't easy, son.

• Winifred : Why don't you get yourself a real female with something decent like pneumonoconiosis, or - or gall stones?

  Seymour : Well, maybe she could catch something like that.

  Winifred : The only thing she'll catch is you. And she'll take you off to some shady sanatorium and leave me to chiropractors and faith healers. I know when I'm not wanted.

• Winifred : You know what you got?

  Officer Frank Stoolie : Just the facts, ma'am.

  Winifred : Trench mouth. Oh, I know, I had it back in '09.