The Midnight Patrol (1933)

Oliver Hardy: Officer Oliver Hardy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Car Dispatcher : Calling Car Thirteen.

  Oliver : That's us.

  Car Dispatcher : Calling Car One-Three.

  Stanley : I thought he said Thirteen.

  Oliver : Shut up.

  Car Dispatcher : Look out, boys, somebody's stealing your spare tire. That is all.

• Oliver : Will you do me a favor?

  Stanley : What?

  Oliver : Let me do this *my* way once. Thank you. Now when I count three, we go that way

  [indicating the front door of the house] 

  Oliver : - - not *this* way!

  [indicating the water in the fishpond in which they are currently standing knee-deep] 

• Stanley : [sitting in the driver's seat while Hardy examines the squad car's engine to see why it won't fire]  Maybe we're outta gas.

  Oliver : [glancing up from under the hood with his famous restrained-fury haughtily-arrogant gaze in reaction to Laurel's apparent incompetence]  Mind - - your own - - BIZness!

  Stanley : [reaches down to the dashboard and pulls out a large knob - - probably the choke or throttle - - causing a huge jet of clear liquid to shoot out of the intake-valve and straight into Hardy's face as he's peering down and tinkering with it]  What happened?

  Oliver : [disgustedly scowling back at Laurel with a drenched dripping face]  We're NOT out of GAS!

• Oliver : Do something to help me. Don't stand there looking at me!

• Oliver : We're just in the nick of time.

  Stanley : What time is it?

  Oliver : [disgusted]  What time is it? Get out!