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The Rig (2023)
I hoped it would get, I was seriously wrong
Where to start, well it has to be the writing first, it is woeful, the dialogue is laughable. Some of the speeches made me laugh they were so bad. It's like a child has written it without any research. The direction is ropey at best, but with a script as bad as this you can kinda forgive. The characters are hilarious in some places, everybody does everyone's job. A nurse can run the fire suppression system, a lowly pipefitter can fix virtually anything. Then there is the usual rubbish, the misogynistic man, the lesbian, the enemies who becomes besties, the tortured man who lost a child. Oh yes the rubbish that providers ask for is all there.
As for the storyline, well it's nothing new, it rips off supernatural and sci-fi movies previously and bizarrely it's not a supernatural film in anyway it's all about ecology, yes that terrifying thing.
Then there is the acting, wow, it's bad, even the great Teale and Glenn are not on par. From stupid accents, whispering and to a woman who thinks she is on school stage doing Pygmalion. The rest of the cast may have well been tubs of putty they would have been more believable.
Then the continuity and realism, oil rigs are dirty places but this one, most walk around in brand new overalls, jackets, boots etc. One minute wearing hard hats then not, then shoes instead of boots and still not one dirty hand on view.
Don't even get me started on the CGI, if you can call it that.
It is quite frankly one of the most stupid, badly researched, badly acted, catastrophically written TV series I have ever seen or heard.
National Treasure: Edge of History (2022)
Putrid rubbish, I'm still vomiting
So the films National Treasure 1&2 were decently acted and a good giggle. However this other than Harvey Keitel is nowhere near the films, it's virtually vomit inducing from the start. The acting is bad enough, have they just come from stage school or just found wandering the streets, but the script must be written by a 12 year old child who has not been or seen the real world in years? Disney have gone from bad to worse with virtually everything that they have touched recently but this is a step above anything else. They destroyed Star Wars, Marvel, Willow etc and have put the icing on the cake with this pathetic putrid rubbish. Horribly stupid and vile. At least it won't get a second season.
Werewolf by Night (2022)
Werewolf, where?
Wow, what a run Marvel are on, one great big stinky mess of one. The only redeeming thing is the aptly named Man-Thing who is the best character Marvel have produced since the house of mouse took over.
As for the lead character if that is meant to be a werewolf then God help the next phase of films and TV series. I've seen bigger dog's down the local park than that bizarre man-mongrel thingy. Yes I know they were trying to make it appear like a black and white production from the 1940's but seriously at least make it have a wolf head, not like Lon Chaney's make-up from the 1940's. It's a mythical creature, a beast and Marvel have made it look like demented hamster.
Make this rubbish stop Disney, give the adults something, they after all pay for the subscription not the children.
Inside Man (2022)
Turgid Rancid Pathetic
I was looking forward to this especially with Tucci being one of the leads and the good /bad Tennant. However, the first few minutes clearly showed the way it was set to go, unfortunately ruddy awful. The whole scenario on the train is laughable beyond belief and the acting is cringe worthy. As for the story, well I bet Moffat was laughing to himself of how clever he is', bear in mind this is the man behind the childish Dr Who over the past few years. The dialogue is terrible, who talks like that? Certainly not any average Britain that's for sure. It's hard to believe but even the incidental music is woefull.
Tucci tries but you can even tell he's struggling to get the rubbish past his lips. As for Tennant, well you never know which version you're going to get, the good or the bad, this version - meh. Seriously nobody talks like that Moffat, nobody. For the record, no vicar would swear on the subject matter, none as the scenario would never occur.
Mona Lisa and the Blood Moon (2021)
Utterly woeful
So I saw the cast and premise and thought we could be on a winner here. Could I be more wrong, what the hell is it? The acting is appalling, the direction is as if it's a school project written by someone below the age of ten. The actors are so miscast it's hard to fathom any professional casting director thinking they were right for the role.
However the ultimate crime is the director thinking her choice of music throughout the movie is somehow atmospheric and clever, let me tell her its hideously bad.
How Ana Lily Amirpour got a gig after her last movie is amazing, it can only be a hope that she returns to the oddness of her debut film. Stop trying to be deliberately weird and get back to directing.
Last Night in Soho (2021)
Good for Wright
Yes it's ok for Edgar Wright but it is still very average and wholly obvious from the start. Well acted from all and the soundtrack is pleasant enough but still average. Wright is deeply overrated but somehow keeps getting away with it, such is life and the modern era of directors.
Only Murders in the Building: The Tell (2022)
Well that was obvious.
Cara Delevingne cannot act that's about the only fact you get from this filler episode. Also the fact that nobody noticed a ruddy great big vent on the floor baffles me.
The Man Who Fell to Earth: Unwashed and Somewhat Slightly Dazed (2022)
Best episode so far.
I wasn't sure where this series was heading and was starting to roll my eyes with the whining and woke rubbish. However, enter Rob Delaney, add some comedy and some super acting from the whole cast and I'm definitely in for the season. The low scores are people thinking it should follow the book and film with Bowie. Now changing colour and sex from books does annoy me, if they were popular enough in fiction to warrant a film then they should keep with the character as is. However when this is clearly only in name and it's clearly just trying to entertain the watcher, plus the assembled cast is super, then grow some and just enjoy people.
Uncharted (2022)
Oh dear, but no surprise
Dear lord, who said Sophia Ali was an actor, hardwork version and nothing like the character they should be. Bad casting all over the place. Possibly the worst casting ever that will ever be seen.
Shining Vale (2022)
Good writing, terrible casting
So the teenage high school girl is once again played by a woman in her 20''s and the 2 parents who have 2 young teenage kids are in in their late 50's, plausible yes, but highly unlikely. If you are going to try and portray something with real world belief then at least start with the cast.
Clean (2021)
Don't understand the mindset of some
Yes it's not a new story, man wanting quiet life after being a killer, thusly returning to his graphic nature. However it is slow for a reason, it's Brody he's a proper actor, not an all action hero, he wants to convey reason and not just show up basically having a tantrum over some injustice. The middle section is padded as are all these type of films, what do the critics expect? All out reflection or all out war? It's a better than most big budget movies and kills an easy hour and thirty, with not having to ponder over where the movie will go.
Kimi (2022)
Probably Koepp and Soderbergh worse movie
Well it's nothing new and the acting is average, Kravitz is terrible, she has all the emotional scope of a red setter. As said it's nothing new and the script must be one of the worse by Koepp, even the usually great direction from Soderbergh is all over the place.
Reacher (2022)
Great fun
Reacher as he should be. Great acting from all. Blood, violence and lame jokes, just what TV should be, plus no woke crap. Season 2 please, c'mon TV for adults not the kids who don't actually pay for the service.
Swan Song (2021)
Turgid vapid are the two good points
Ali and Close make it worth the time but the rest of the cast are pretty much average, Harris is never believable. As for the story itself it just wallows in negativity, you don't care or feel for the characters, it's slow, it is definitely an Apple movie.
The Book of Boba Fett: Chapter 3: The Streets of Mos Espa (2022)
Rancid piffle
What an awful episode, full of cliché and terrible acting, boy Sophie Thatcher is woefully bad. This episode has basically characters that make the Power Rangers look positively normal and good. Sophie Thatcher's character Drash is basically the leader of a bunch of 'teenage' thugs who have no money and steal stuff. However they all ride brand new colourful hover bikes and dress immaculately, turns out you can polish a turd. This is just another Disney cash cow and subsequently aims at young children and the blinkered. Jobs for the boys yet again.
Star Trek: Discovery: ...But to Connect (2021)
Appalling rubbish
Terrible acting is one thing, bad directing is another, having horrible characters is pretty game changing. However the final straw is the dialogue it is so truly woke awful it's unforgivable. It's childish, boring, and appeals to a minority of a minority.
The Book of Boba Fett (2021)
Just for single minded, blinkered Star Wars fans
Poor acting, turgid story, terrible action scenes, yep sounds about right for the last few Star Wars outings. Just more woke Disney rubbish but it'll be pushed to hell in the media.
Hawkeye: So This Is Christmas? (2021)
Childish rubbish, which is a pity as the two leads do well
So the leads do well with which is basically childish rubbish. Pugh however just makes it worse, she is appallingly bad as usual, and that awful accent, truly woeful. As soon as Disney acquired Marvel we knew this woke rubbish would occur but we believed they might stick with characters, however they change, white male characters to anything else but and male to female at any point. However the idiots will still give 10/10 just for the mindless rubbish, pity as the leads had decent chemistry. It's the end of the comic book era, it's more like fairytales and fables.
The Matrix Resurrections (2021)
Dear god no
Just awful. Terrible acting from most, insipid story, woefully bad script, just silly and bad. The third movie tried too hard and was subsequently bad in many places, this is just bad throughout. The characters shout at nearly every weird moment, like a TV episode so you understand the moment. There is no redemption from this other than it looks great in places.
Jiok (2021)
Warning: The dubbed version is not correct
Do not watch the dubbed version, it is very bad and does not follow the Korean version. Watch the subtitles and it's a much better series, with much more emphasis on what it is trying to show.
Foundation: The Leap (2021)
Well I made it to the end
I did make it to the end, which did surprise me as I realized pretty soon it had virtually nothing to do with the novels. On the whole it was appalling, Pace and Harris were great but the rest was twaddle. You can always tell the truth of a whole TV series by the rating a single episode gets, when a singular voter reviews it as 10/10, that review gets subsequently more thumbs down than up. Trust me it works. What a waste of a great book? Hands up with utter respect to the costume department and the VFX, the true heroes, brilliant job.
Foundation: The First Crisis (2021)
The Apple production team must have been busy?
So I thought I'd venture to the very end as the VFX and costume department truly deserve the recognition, not forgetting Lee Pace and Jared Harris. However the rest is just awful, the acting from Harvey and Llobell is just horrible, the writing is incoherent and woeful, anything that needs a narrator usually means struggling badly. So who does give theses 10/10 scores?
Fear the Walking Dead: The Portrait (2021)
Putrid vomit
Not a blind bit of sense. People transporting the dead with 'bits' of a nuclear weapon within them. Firstly the people handling the nuclear core would be dying from obvious reasons. Secondly how big do the writers think a nuclear missile core is? Thirdly JUST SHOOT THE PEOPLE, in all other episodes it's proved they have enough ammunition. However, no they just let what looks like all of four people just wander around and play with a trebuchet whilst they have automatic weapons and a so called super shot sniper. Just ludicrously bad writing and amazed how bad it gets each time. You sincerely have to wonder who gives this garbage 10/10, the production team can only be the answer. The ending is hilarious, do your research idiot writers, well people who tap crap out, because you certainly ain't writers.
The Electrical Life of Louis Wain (2021)
What is it meant to be? Comedy, drama, serious biography?
I wanted to like this as I like Cumberbatch and wanted to see if he could do comedy and indeed he can. However remove his character and this becomes a maudlin tale of nothing, it basically cannot decide what it is. Wain's life and pretty much all the family lived a pitiful existence but the director deems to give the film the Beatrix Potter children's treatment. Subsequently it just doesn't work.
Invasion: The King Is Dead (2021)
At least it's consistent.
Hard to believe after the three episodes I previously watched I'm here again hoping we get an invasion. Amazing also how IMDb failed to except my reviews as well, just derogatory about the writing etc but IMDb now seems to be part of the cancel culture, don't say a bad word, then why have the review system.
Anyway it is consistent, consistently bad.