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Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
An Awesome Mess
I really don't like the MCU very much, but I love Spiderman wholeheartedly. I watched this movie 5 times in theaters, imagine my hype level at this movie's reveals.
But my hype didn't stop me from seeing this movie's glaring problems.
As many have mentioned before, the events that set the story in to motion are ridiculous. Even I know that Dr. Strange is acting strongly irrational and impulsive. And then he has the gull to blame Peter, even though Strange is jumping in to a spell without explaining its effects on Peter's life. This is actually an unacceptable level of writing.
Not only that, but they messed up most of the big cameos in this movie.
First off, Jamie Fox's Electro is just a straight up a different character. I think Fox's ego might've gotten in the way of the writing because he is literally the same character he played in Baby Driver. What happened to the sensible and insecure Max from TASM 2? He is also not blue anymore, andq he doesn't even mention the fact. That being said, his character does get a few intentional laughs.
Flint Marko and Dr. Connors were just there, so they can tease and not deliver the Sinister Six. The actors weren't even on set. They could've easily been cut from the movie and nothing would be lost. They also don't explain why Flint Marko stays in sand form the entire time. It's really weird and distracting because he never did that in Spiderman 3.
Dr. Octavius was alright, even if he did seem a little more whiny than usual. And they pull a weird fake out scene with him where he just runs off for no good reason except that it's convenient for the plot.
Norman Osborne was great, except that he is freakishly strong compared to the first Spiderman movie. Maybe Tom Hollands Spiderman is just a lot weaker than Toby's.
If they had Electro acting like Electro, and given Dr. Octavius a bit more of a motive for the mentioned scene, we could've had a nice 3v3 setting without the nonsense Connors and Marko brought with them.
On the flip side, I love what they did with Andrew's Peter Parker. He alone had two scenes that made me teary-eyed.
They also did a great job with MJ. She was less snarky and quirky and more supporting and vulnerable. I actually really enjoy her character now.
Toms Peter got some very strong emotional moments as well, and I like that they essentially fixed every common complaint people had about his character.
One more thing I have to get off my chest is that the CGI in this movie is horrendous. Pretty much all the most important scenes in this movie look distractingly terrible. From Andrew's reveal to his key scene with MJ. My first time seeing the movie, I honestly wondered if that is Spiderman from a animated universe until he took off his mask.
The entire end battle looks terrible as well. The color scheme for that fight is just dark browns and greens. It's as if they were trying to hide the terrible CGI. Unfortunately, that results in there being very few actual frames where we can see the Spidermen in action. Just from the memes I've seen about the movie where people are trying to create templates, it seems there are very few shots that can even work as pictures because it's very dark and is usually blurred by motion.
Don't get me wrong, the movie is great, but it easily could've been a 10/10 movie for me. That's why it's so infuriating to see them blunder all this potential. I don't know if it was studio interference, but a lot of baffling creative decision keep this movie from being a masterpiece for Spidey fans.
The Son (2022)
Manipulative
My initial reaction to The Son was rather positive. I thought it was a gut-wrenching film, and I thought I understood what the director was going for. On second thought, however, I realized just how clumsily this movie is at getting an emotional reaction from its audience. It keeps taking shortcuts in favor of logic to get shocking moments. And when a movie is that desperate to shock, it feels like manipulative Oscar bait.
The movie shows the story of a depressed teenager who moves in with his dad, and the struggle the family goes through attempting to help him.
To the films credit, it does a really great job at showing how confused and helpless the adults are with the situation. There isn't much information given to what is actually going on in their son's head, but it's a realistic situation that a lot of parents can relate to.
Further in the movie, the boy gets overwhelmed and attempts suicide. This is where the script tries so hard to force drama.
Instead of the therapists educating the parents on the situation and having them accept therapy for their boy, the "professionals" have the bright idea to bring the kicking and screaming teenager in to the office in front of his parents, begging to be released, and essentially pressuring them in to approving therapy for him.
And of course, the sight of their child in misery convinces them to release him from the hospital, even with him on suicide watch. It's an understandable reaction from a parents perspective after that stunt the doctors pulled.
This is one of the things that make the movie seems dishonest. Behind the scenes they kept mentioning what an important movie this is, especially with depression on the rise, but instead of depicting therapy realistically, they lean in to the drama to get an emotional rise out of the viewer.
As if that wasn't enough, the father keeps a fully loaded gun in his apartment even after his son attempted suicide. And in the middle of his family's reunification, the only thing we know for certain the son wanted, and his seeming satisfaction with the situation, he goes to the backroom and kills himself with the aforementioned gun.
Like I said, the movie doesn't care about logical conclusions. It just wants the audience to cry.
Well, I don't respect that. You've got to earn it.
That being said, the acting if pretty good. Even with all of my complaints, it is hard not to get emotional at the ending of the film with Hugh Jackman giving a heartbreaking performance.
On the other hand, I have to agree with what a lot of people have been saying. The actor playing Nicholas isn't very convincing. I wish him all the best and believe his acting will definitely improve, but this just ain't it, yet.
The Revenant (2015)
Painfully Riveting
Don't be fooled by its genre or some of the negative reviews. This is much more than a traditional revenge story.
The movie has elements of body horror. It borders on a war drama and plays out a lot like a western.
But yes, at its core there is a revenge story that leans heavily in to its survival element. However, it doesn't play out monotonously. He isn't running through the woods, slaughtering camp after camp to satisfy his revenge.
That being said, I think this movie may be a lot to handle for many people. It is violent in the most realistic and uncomfortable way. The movie has a gripping way of showing what is being felt, that it constantly left me feeling stressed and anxious. Even the characters reacting to the setting is enough to make me uneasy. It's like I can feel the blistering cold.
Tom Hardy is such an amazing actor. I can't believe the Venom scripts are wasting this guy on the most generic action films. But I digress. You know a villain is working when at all times you are hoping for someone to blow his head off.
What can I say about DiCaprio that hasn't been said countless times before? Even with him being incapacitated for a large part of the movie, he remains personable and keeps you rooting for him.
My god does this movie look incredible. So many memorable shots that could hang in a museum. The camera work is creative and always adjusts its motion to the mood of the scene. Some of the takes are pretty long and excellently choreographed.
If you have the strength to handle an intense experience like this, please do.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)
Better than expected
The child in me was excited, but my inner critic had very low hopes for this film. Most of all, I was worried that the movie wasn't going to be funny.
Luckily, I was wrong. There were a lot of good jokes in this film and even the jokes from the trailers that didn't land with me, worked much better in the context of the film and their full length.
However, some of my other concerns were not laid to rest.
They did, like the trailers already show sideline Luigi. He clearly does not have enough screen time. Instead, we get a lot of Peach.
To be fair, she is not as bad as I expected. Yes, she is the overpowered princess who has no arc, but she is charming enough - though not nearly as entertaining as Luigi. The classic story of Mario and Luigi saving Peach would've probably made a better film because the brothers have great chemistry.
The story is also lacking significantly. Not in plot or ideas, but it never has any time to breathe, making it hard to get a feeling for the world and characters because everything is skimmed over briefly.
The Montage shown in the trailer of Peach and Mario traveling through familiar worlds together is basically all that is in the movie. They don't spend any time in those worlds. They never interact with the world in a way that awakes any curiosity. All the familiar sites are just nostalgia fodder.
There are some good setups for potential emotional scenes that just never land as well as they could because the movie is in a hurry to throw as many game references in as it can.
On the other hand, they are really fun to spot and cleverly implemented.
Chris Pratt as Mario is excellent and fun to listen to. All the scenes where I cringed at his voice acting in the trailers were rerecorded. They even explain away some of the complaints people had about the accent. Anya, as mentioned before, is very likable as peach and Charlie Day as Luigi is perfection. Jack Black's Browser is the perfect combination of Goofy and Menacing.
The characters were mostly good, even though to me, Donkey Kong and Toad felt off. Donkey was a bit of a douche. He was intentionally written that way, but that's just never how I saw his character after the Donkey Kong Country series. Seth Rogens voice also didn't do the character justice. And Toad was rather unfunny and annoying to me.
The movie also has a lot of action. It's well animated, and again, is jam-packed with references, but my brain kind of just went into a passive state where I know I am seeing amazingly animated action but don't feel anything beyond the knowledge of colorful pictures being presented to me, resulting in boredom. Again, it's the fast pace of the movie that doesn't give a lot of time to feel what is being shown.
It is a good film for Mario fans, but I honestly don't know if an adult who didn't grow up with the series would get as much enjoyment out of the film. It's far from perfect but fans should definitely see it regardless.
Mindcage (2022)
It's not all bad, but it's still awful
The movie opens with Martin Lawrence's character Jake Doyle at a crime scene, who seems to be our protagonist. But luckily he is not.
I've never seen him in a movie, but I know he is pretty well known for his role in the Bad Boys movies. I wouldn't have guessed he was an actor at all, considering his Performance in this movie. Jesus, it is painful to watch.
But like I said, luckily his character is pushed aside in favor of Melissa Roxburgh's character - and yes, she is the far superior actor from what I can tell.
The story follows detectives trying to solve a murder case that resembles crimes that happened years ago by an incarcerated serial killer.
Now, this movie spends the majority of its time following leads that literally go nowhere. Because, as we later discover, The imprisoned murderer is committing the crimes from his jail cell. How? He is using magic to possess people through pencil drawings.
So why does the movie drop hints of potential killers throughout the movie, even though the mystery can't be solved by the audience?
It has so many Plot Holes and gaps in logic. Why does the killer keep hunting down sex workers? No idea. Who were the sex workers? I don't think they even had names. Why does Martin Lawrence's character lose his temper during and interrogation, even pull out a gun on the suspect, when for all he knows the suspect didn't even kill his partner? There are more but I really don't remember them. It's been a few weeks since I've seen it.
The bright spots in the movie are the dialogue between Melissa Roxburghs and John Malkovich's characters. Which truthfully are just trying to be Silence of the Lambs. They are entertaining though and well written nonetheless. John Malkovich really gives it his all.
Can't recommend this, but I have seen a lot worse.
12 Angry Men (1957)
This is Cinema
If you think 12 men sitting in a lifeless room discussing a murder case for one and a half hours is going to be boring, get ready to be proven wrong.
After a murder trial, one man on the jury votes not guilty to avoid a false verdict and suggests that the case isn't as clear-cut as it seems.
This script is layered and the characters diverse. Every single person is realistic and giving appropriate time to show exactly what they are about.
The arguments are vivid and intelligent. Characters aren't dumbed down for the sake of making others look smart. As soon as you think one character outsmarted the other, they come up with a logical counter that forces them to rethink their position. And although they are in a room with nothing more than a few chairs and a table throughout the entire thing, they find vivid ways to visualize, or tell the story verbally.
This film is a must-watch. It's a great character study and if you're trying to get yourself or somebody else into classic films, this one is an easy watch to get you started.
Absolutely phenomenal!
The Lighthouse (2019)
I don't get it and I'm okay with that
I'm not going to try and try to convey the meaning or hidden symbolism of this film because truthfully, I'm probably even more confused than most of you.
What I can say is that I was glued to the screen start to finish.
Even with the setting being so desolate and unsettling, I ended up having a lot of fun with this movie.
The setting is a remote island in the 19th century with very little going on the surface. However, the intense isolation eventually drives our two protagonists (Robert Patterson and Willem Dafoe) insane.
The scenes of them losing their mind are claustrophobic and intense. They have extremely memorable dialogue, delivered amazingly by these S-tier actors.
This movie really conveys a feeling more than anything else. The look of the island and its haunting visuals. The blaring and horrifying screams of the foghorn. The entire film just brands in to your brain and is unforgettable.
It's definitely a harder watch for your average movie goer, but I think it is a very rewarding experience. And even though it left me feeling confused by the end of, it is unlike anything I've seen before.
Nope (2022)
Bites off more than it can ...digest, but it's still a good time
This was the first Jordan Peele movie I saw and boy was it a mess. And it gets worse the more I think about it. But despite all its flaws, I had a good time with it.
The movie features Daniel Kaluuya and Keke Palmer in the main roles. Since seeing this, I have seen "Get Out" and I know what an incredible actor Daniel Kaluuya is, but he doesn't exactly shine in this role. He's very good at giving nuanced performances, but he doesn't really have all too much to work with here. Keke's character is played well, but I can't say I liked her character at all. She plays a very over the top and quirky role, but she isn't very likable to me.
The film's premise is completely illogical and is contradicted by itself. There is a UFO terrorizing the protagonist's family farm in the middle of nowhere. Now, the movie essentially says in not so many words that even if they had footage of a UFO, nobody would care or even believe them because it might as well be fake. But what do they spend the entire movie doing? They risk their necks trying to get video footage of the UFO. I don't know if this is done to push what I think is commentary on sensationalism, but it just doesn't coincide with the established rules of this film.
In the end, they defeat what is revealed to be a monster in the most ridiculous way. Even managing to get a low resolution photo of the flying whatnot in the sky, as if it were their saving grace. I'd think the corpse of the thing would be more convincing than that. Where does this Monster come from? It clearly doesn't matter that things been flying around for decades, apparently, and nobody is able to detect it.
I know I'm complaining a lot, but this movie is by no means boring. It is genuinely entertaining front to back, even through all his logical fallacies. And even though the movie isn't exactly horror, it does have strong thrilling scenes. The scene at the house, with the monster regurgitating blood on it, is tense and shot so well that it looks like it's straight out of a concept art book.
The same thing goes for the flashback scenes to the sitcom set, which are quite disturbing... even with the Chimpanzee CGI being a bit unconvincing.
I'd say if you check this film out, you'll probably find something to enjoy with it. And if you're a Jordan Peele fan, I think you'll probably love this regardless of its flaws. I'll probably watch it again someday.
Puss in Boots (2011)
Hilarious and clever
I remember seeing this one in the theater and thinking it was funny. But I was 13 back then, so of course I did. But due to the Hype around the new film and surprisingly not loving it after watching it in theaters myself, I spontaneously decided to watch this one on Netflix a few days ago.
To my surprise, this movie is hilarious. It has that dark Shrek humor that I love and excellent characters. I could listen to Antonio Banderas as Puss all day. It's just so much fun. He also has great chemistry with Kitty Softpaws (Salma Hayek). Watching them together is great in this movie, and none of their banter gets annoying, even though it does border on being cliché.
Humpty Dumpty plays the main antagonist of this story alongside Jack and Jill, and luckily, they don't try to make it a twist, and they hint at it multiple times. Humpty and Jack and Jill also get a few laughs and are enjoyable to watch.
The jokes in the film are mostly excellent and don't rely on a comedic relief GIF and Merch generator to say wacky stuff.
It also has decent emotional moments, while not taking itself too serious, and does give the villain a pretty great send off that I didn't expect. It's not brilliant, but its neat.
The Animation is also really fun. I know a lot of people have criticized the look of modern animation, but I believe a lot of the comedy derives from the way the people look in the Shrek series. Slightly uncanny, but it also looks endearing when it needs to.
I definitely have to choose it as the stronger movie between the two, and I know everyone I've seen online disagrees, but that's just me. You're free to choose your favorite.
Babylon (2022)
Ups & downs
Honestly, when the movie opened with a poop joke, I was afraid. I thought this was the humor we were going to get for the rest of the movie. And I was right... sort of. There is an abundance of crude humor in this film, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but a lot of it is the typical adult comedy gross out humor or excessive profanity. Defecating on people. Throwing up on people. The usual stuff. At this point, that kind of humor is just really boring to me. But the audience in my theater was having a blast with the jokes, so who am I to say it's not funny.
But there were a fair amount of good jokes for me too. Though, they were more like side jokes rather than the longer gags the movie does.
But even though this movie is advertised mainly as a comedy first, there is luckily so much more to this film.
This movie has a very long prologue. But it is a blast. The set and choreography at the party is extremely loud and chaotic, but it's entertaining and establishes our main characters perfectly.
The movie seems like director Damien Chazelle took The Wolf of Wall street and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, mashed them together and seasoned it with a touch of Cinema Paradiso (and obviously singin' in the rain). Except that "OUATIH" and "Cinema Paradiso" are more of a love letter to classic cinema. This movie does not shy away from showing how disgusting, arrogant and shallow the film industry can be. Though it does ultimately end on a positive note in my interpretation.
The story follows an aspiring filmmaker, an aspiring actress and a superstar at the end of his career. All these characters are great and obviously played amazingly by this all star cast. The standout for me being Diego Calva, who I didn't even know before this movie. But his character is super likeable, and he does surprisingly hold his own against Brad Pitt and Margot.
More than once the movie kind of leaves you hanging with its story. It jumps from one crazy and over the top scene to the next. But it doesn't lose focus of our protagonists and develops them alongside the mayhem going on around them.
Somewhere around the middle part of the movie, things almost slow to a halt, and it makes you wonder where the heck they will go from here. Because it has a runtime of about 3hrs, I knew there was more to come. But surprisingly enough, it picks up again with the introduction of Tobey Maguires character, who is hilarious. Maybe I'm biased because I've never seen him in a role like this, and it threw me off. But from there on out it gets even crazier.
As you may be able to tell, the movie does a lot of things, and it does balance them well. Even though, like mentioned before, it does leave you hanging with where the movie is going more than once.
As usual in a Damien Chazelle Film, the soundtrack is amazing. It underscores the craziness of this film perfectly, and sometimes just goes all out with its speed and volume.
So that's Babylon. I'd say if the first part of my review didn't scare you away, you're going to have a great time with this film. There is so much here for film lovers and, generally, is just a really good time. Too bad that the marketing failed the movie, because I do think it does have a wider appeal than what the box office shows.
The Time Machine (2002)
The superior time machine film
Let me just start by explaining my frustration with the 1950s film. Unlike the original novel, which takes its time in building the world, the 1960s Film feels like it just bounces from iconic story beat from the book to the next without any buildup. He ends up 80, 000 years in the future and everybody speaks English. All the background and science behind the Eloy and the world is completely ignored. They are just humans as we know them. All the wonder and sense of exploration is just not present in the movie.
And Although this is a looser interpretation, it does have a stronger sense of wonder and exploration I know and love from the novel.
The story begins with Alexander Hartdegen, played by Guy Pearce, a professor who proposes to the woman he loves minutes before she is murdered. 4 years pass, and he successfully constructs a time machine to go back to the night when she was killed. He discovers that a time paradox will not allow him to save her as whenever he tries, she is killed by other circumstances. It's a unique take on the classic story. Whereas in the original his only motivation is scientific curiosity, this modern take shows a tunnel visioned scientist trying to find an answer to his one question: why can't he change the past?
Unable to find the answer to that question in the near future, he travels 800 000 years in the future. From here on, the situation is very similar to what we know in the book and previous movie. But it definitely plays out a lot better than in the classic film, in my opinion. The people there don't all speak English, but instead have their children learn it as an ancient language they discovered. A lot of small touches like that make the new world feels more organic to me.
But it's still not quite as clever as it could be. The film doesn't experiment with telling the story visually because of the language barrier. Instead, they have 2 Eloy who speak english perfectly to translate everything, but it is more believable than what's shown in the 1960s film.
However, it treads some of the same mistakes the other film does. The Eloy are still just regular humans even though they are 80, 000 years in the future. Admittedly, they do imply that humans have gone extinct and evolution essentially started from scratch. I guess biology could evolve the same species under the same circumstances twice. But it lacks creativity, I think.
The Morlocks look really good though. The costumes and the CGI are both solid and blend nicely.
Overall, the film is a good time, though it does still leave a lot to be desired.
I'd say if you haven't read the book, you might find pleasure with the 1960s film. But to me, it was just the book, but significantly inferior.
If you have read the book, you might like this loose adaption more for its own ideas and not treading the same ground.
Detective Knight: Redemption (2022)
Really awful...
I don't even know where to begin with this one. The dialogue in this movie is abhorrent. Every single line of dialogue uttered is so formulaic and derivative that it makes you wonder why in the world you should even continue watching. It's like it was written by an Ai that was fed bad action films.
On a technical side: large amounts of dialogue are clearly recorded after shooting and just thrown in without going through an equalizer or being synced to what's spoken on screen. A lot of it sounds like they just sent a WhatsApp voice message and threw it in to the video editor.
On the Blu-ray, there is a behind the scenes clip where the director mentions that the shooting for all three Detective Knight movies were done in 28 days or something like that. It really shows.
This movie was clearly made as cheaply as possible, although it may not be obvious at first. The cinematography and colors look good enough. If you saw a still or a trailer of it, you'd probably think it was an average action flick. But don't be fooled. There are terrible special effects. Missing sound effects on firing guns. Weird use of green screen that will have you scratching your head (The after credits scene is a joke, right?)
This is an easy skip!
Alice, Darling (2022)
Too dull to recommend
"Alice, Darling" tells a story of a woman stuck in a manipulative and controlling relationship. However, what makes this take special is how subtle and understated this relationship is compared to the typical wife beater you might see in many other media. And even though I think it fails ultimately as a good film, I believe it still has value for educational reasons and may even be eye-opening to some people going through similar relationships, though; I can't judge that with full confidence because I am by no means an expert. But I can try to give you an Idea on the quality of the film as a whole.
The plot is fairly simple at first glance. Alice, Tess and Sophie take a trip to a cottage for Tess's Birthday. However, Alice lies to her Partner and says that she's going on a business trip for reasons not yet clear.
The movie kind of just drags on from there on out. They get to the cottage and they argue a lot.
The intrigue comes from Alice's reactions to any sort of message or reference to her boyfriend. These are just brief scenes, but Anna Kendrick plays them to perfection, making every panic attack painfully realistic and depressing to watch.
The cast overall is very strong in my opinion, but like I mentioned before, Alice and her friends don't really do all that much besides argue. It definitely serves its purpose in painting her boyfriend (Simon) to be a manipulative partner, but as a viewer, seeing these characters go at each other's throats is just mind-numbingly annoying.
Even after some of the tension loosens between the friends, the mood doesn't really lift all that much because it is all shot in the most distant and cold manner. Essentially, leaving all the positive emotion the characters are supposedly feeling lost to the audience. Maybe it's the lack of vibrant colors or the overindulgent cinematography, but it just didn't resonate with me the way it was meant to.
The strongest parts are definitely in direct confrontation with the abusive manner of Alice's relationship. For instance, in one scene, Alice is explaining how her boyfriend would shame her for eating chips in the most calm and oblivious manner while the smiles melt from her friends faces.
It is followed by another strong scene where her boyfriend comes to the cottage after finding out she lied about the business trip. I think this is one of the scenes that perfectly demonstrate the kind of relationship they are really in. He knows she is out having fun with her friends, but instead of leaving her be, he uses excuses to rain on their parade. Turning the lodge from a place where Alice was starting to feel comfortable, into another place where she is scared to do anything wrong.
One of the reasons he gives for his unannounced visit is the missing girl who was found dead. This is where the movie left me clueless to be completely honest. I can not for the life of me figure out what the significance of the missing girl is. It becomes a semi obsession of Alice throughout the film, but the connection to her is not explained, nor why she spends large parts of the movie looking for her. She does find a potential clue to the case and Simon shuts her down on it, but I don't believe they spent that much time on that subplot just for that one scene. I would stamp it out as my ignorance or unwillingness to dig for the deeper meaning, but truthfully, it isn't exactly an intriguing mystery that I have any incentive to care about.
The climax of the movie is pretty fitting, I think. It doesn't really wrap up neatly, but it doesn't need to. As Simon decides to take Alice back home, Sophie smashes in the rearview window of his car, resulting in a stare down between him and the girls. Ultimately, he decides to leave. But how does it continue when she has to leave the cottage and get back to life as usual? It is left rather open-ended in that regard, but it makes sense. There isn't one solution that will work. It isn't always as simple as just breaking up and goodbye forever.
And that's the movie, basically. It's hard to have a good time with this film. It really does do its best to show how a relationship like this looks realistically. But watching it is just not enjoyable. It feels too much like a chore. It's not horrible, but I can't find many reasons to recommend it to anybody. I do believe the movie is too slow and irritating for anyone who can't directly relate to the subject.