The DUFF (2015)
Mae Whitman: Bianca Piper
Photos
Quotes
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Toby Tucker : The song was mine.
Bianca Piper : Yeah I'm not surprised cause it was a piece of shit... and so are you.
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Bianca Piper : In the end, it isn't about popularity or even getting the guy. It's about understanding that no matter what label is thrown your way, only you can define yourself.
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Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Where are your girls at?
Bianca Piper : It's actually not my job to give you pervey intel on my best friends but good luck anyway.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Well it kind of is though, you know as their duff.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush , Bianca Piper : Sorry, as their what?
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Duff, D-U-F-F: Designated Ugly Fat Friend.
Bianca Piper : What did you just say to me?
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : It's not like a big deal, every group has one, you know the one who doesn't look as good , thus making their friends look better. The one whose easy to talk to because no one's trying to get with them. You friended up! Good time!
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Bianca Piper : Is that a wiener in your mouth or are you just happy to see me?
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Bianca Piper : If I wanted to go shopping, I could have done that with Jess and Casey. I need you to give me real talk.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : You've gotta a uniboob. Your posture sucks and your clothes fit weird 'cause you wear the wrong size bra. Boom! Real talk!
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Wesley 'Wes' Rush : You can't take it so literally. A DUFF doesn't actually have to be fat or ugly. You know, it's like Tony Romo is a Dallas Cowboy. It's not like he rides a horse.
Bianca Piper : I have no idea what the hell you're talking about.
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Mr. Arthur : You may not believe this, but I was the DUFF out of my friends.
Bianca Piper : [sarcastically] No! Really?
Mr. Arthur : Yeah, there was no cool name for it when I was in high school, it was like the Dipshit, Douchebag, use to get Asian Erkel.
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Matt : Oh! What the hell Bianca?
[attempts to cover bulge in underwear as Bianca enters the lockeroom]
Bianca Piper : Kinda looks like a penis, only smaller.
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Bianca Piper : Ok free lesson... the first one is always free. Ok so lean in, slowly, close your eyes and
[licks his face up to the forehead]
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : [wiping his head with his sleeve] Oh! No way!... You... are a phenomenal kisser!
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Bianca Piper : Oh, uh, I... I have a date.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Hmm?
[flexes pecks]
Bianca Piper : Don't do that?
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : You do? You don't?
[flexes pecks twice]
Bianca Piper : Stop! Uh...
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Question?
[rolls pecks]
Bianca Piper : It's important!
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : What? What do you want?
[flexes and rolls them twice with each sentence]
Bianca Piper : Come on, please!
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Dottie : You... look crazy
[stares down in horror at Bianca's pajamas and sock crock attire]
Bianca Piper : Crazy amazing.
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Bianca Piper : [aftering punching Wes in the face] Why is your hand messed up?
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Believe me. You're not the only one running around, punching people today.
[Cutaway to Wes slamming a teammate against the wall]
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : No one sees that video again! Got me? You tell everyone!
Matt : I don't know that many people.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Well, make some more friends, and tell them.
[Wes walks away]
Matt : [confused] What?
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Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Are you giving me kissing advice?
Bianca Piper : Yes, I guess I am.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : B...
Bianca Piper : Yeah, you need it.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : That's how people kiss.
Bianca Piper : Euhm... in porn, maybe.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : What's wrong with porn?
Bianca Piper : If this was a porn movie, we would not be sitting on a rock having a conversation, you know, you'd be bringing me a pizza or ehm... cleaning my pool.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : How old is the porn you are watching?... That is not a thing anymore.
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Bianca Piper : Why was I Bosley? There were three angels!
[glancing in horror at the old dress-up photo on facebook of younger Jess, Casey and herself]
Bianca Piper : .
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Madison Morgan : Girls, party at my place. I'm sure you've heard of it... Caitlyn, can you make sure you get an Instagram shot of them opening it?
Caitlyn : Yep, on it.
Madison Morgan : Oh yeah, I'm doing a video about the party for my YouTube channel.
Bianca Piper : Whoa, wait, you're having a party on a Wednesday? On a school night?
Madison Morgan : Yeah, I can do that.
Bianca Piper : Damn, dude, all right. Well, yeah, we're in.
Madison Morgan : Oooh, um, Bianca, you have to have an actual invite to get in and I only have a certain amount but, um, if anything changes, I'll let you know.
Casey Cordero : Problem solved.
Bianca Piper : Hey, look at that.
Madison Morgan : Wonderful.
Bianca Piper : Can't wait! Should I bring anything or, well, okay!
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Bianca Piper : Alright, let's do this shit!
[upon looking at Jess' finished product]
Dottie : Fucking A!
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Bianca Piper : How could you guys not tell me that I was your DUFF?
Jessica 'Jess' Harris : Our what?
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Bianca Piper : I had no idea guys like you ever thought about that kind of stuff.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : That's because you're racist against jocks. You're jock-cist.
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Bianca Piper : I'm tired of being the approachable one. I want to be the dateable one.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : You're asking me for dating advice today of all days? Are you kidding me?
Bianca Piper : Look, I have a crush on this boy. His name is Toby Tucker. Maybe you've heard of him. Well, I can't seem to talk to him without making a total ass of myself, okay? And you never seem to have this problem.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Don't you hate me?
Bianca Piper : I'm glad you asked. Yes, I do, but only because you're a man-whore, and a dipshit. Can we just, can we just cool off for a sec? Here's my offer. I will make sure you pass science if you help me with this.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : I'm glad you asked. Yes, I do, but only because you're an idiot. Can we just, can we just cool off for a sec? Here's my offer. I will make sure you pass science if you help me with this.
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Wesley 'Wes' Rush : I'm about to go off and study Hesse's law and how it relates to enthalpic chemical change...
Bianca Piper : Who are you and what have you done with Wes?
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Or maybe I just google celeb nip slips. Curtain's open.
Bianca Piper : There he is... .
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Bianca Piper : Here are my chemistry notes. Live by this and YOU SHALL PASS... the mid term...
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Bianca Piper : [in tart voice] Toby, I really need to talk to you, about us.
Wesley 'Wes' Rush : Don't tell me, tell Toby
[signals towards fancy haired male mannequin]