- Sue Heck: I tried talking to them about their dog and then Carly and I got into this fight with them...
- Frankie Heck: Wait. You got into a fight?
- Sue Heck: Yeah, we had this whole routine planned and everything.
- Mike Heck: Routine? What do you mean, routine?
- Sue Heck: Yeah, well, we worked out some choreography and...
- Mike Heck: Hang on. Choreography for a fight?
- Sue Heck: Yeah, that's what the boombox was for. We played 'Kung Fu Fighting'.
- Mike Heck: You do know what a fight is, don't ya?
- Sue Heck: Of course. And they didn't even let us get to the synchronized cartwheels. We worked really hard on it, too.
- Frankie Heck: Sue, are you okay?
- Sue Heck: The Glossners' dog, it's loose. It tried to chase me home. I lost a shoe. Oh, God, now it has my scent!
- Derrick Glossner: How about a fight?
- Sue Heck: Yeah, yeah, we'll totally fight you.
- Rodney Glossner: After school, your house. Be there.
- Sue Heck: Oh, I'll be there. I live there. I have no after-school activities.
- Axl Heck: It's so lame around here. There's nothing on TV. There's nothing to do.
- Frankie Heck: Here's something. Take your brother out and teach him how to kick this.
- [tosses ball]
- Axl Heck: Can't. Book report.
- Frankie Heck: Well, then turn of the TV and get on it.
- Axl Heck: Fine. I'll teach him. Whatever. Get off me. God!